Even the moon is not alone
it is surrounded by many stars
most you can't even see
They each have a part
in lighting up the sky for God
With my fellow
brothers and sisters
I too have the duty
no the privledge
of lighting up this world
for GOD!
"children of god without fult in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe" - Phil 2:15
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
I wish to be a tree - Abra
I wish to be a tree
In all of it's glory
Firm in stand
Not shaken by another hand
Either dressed or bare
It will always be fair
Stretching to the sky
And never living a lie
Identity as he see
God made him a tree
In a yard or countryside
That is for God to decide
In all of it's glory
Firm in stand
Not shaken by another hand
Either dressed or bare
It will always be fair
Stretching to the sky
And never living a lie
Identity as he see
God made him a tree
In a yard or countryside
That is for God to decide
A poem by me
I walked into a cave
Thinking it was a tunnel
No light it gave
Only into darkness via a funnel
Down, Down, I went
Into the dark abiss
No way to vent
Hoping to not miss
But everytime I closed my eyes
there my Savior stood
With all the tearful goodbyes
He will always be perfectly good
Life is now worth living
I now have a plan
To always be giving
Love received by a holy man
Thinking it was a tunnel
No light it gave
Only into darkness via a funnel
Down, Down, I went
Into the dark abiss
No way to vent
Hoping to not miss
But everytime I closed my eyes
there my Savior stood
With all the tearful goodbyes
He will always be perfectly good
Life is now worth living
I now have a plan
To always be giving
Love received by a holy man
Monday, December 12, 2005
God Sent Me An Angel
by Tommy Q
I was walking along a country road one calm and cloudy day
Feeling down about the problems that had seemed to come my way
My pain was very great and my tears I could not hide
And was calling God to help me as I was hurting deep inside
I then thought about what I've believed and how I've rarely called
For sometimes I have wondered if God were there at all
As I lifted up my head and looked down that road a spell
I spotted someone coming - from the distance hard to tell
As he got a little closer I could then see all the signs
Of someone who'd been down that road quite a number of times
His clothes were old and dusty and his shoes were pretty worn
But there seemed a glow about him - at least I could have sworn
His face appeared real friendly as he peered up in the sky
He said, the weather is pretty calm today, hope the rain will pass us by
He first talked about the weather, but there seemed to be much more
That we both had in common, except for what we wore
He started talking about his life and the places he had been
And he spoke as if he knew me, like we were next-of-kin
From the problems that he had, to the happy times he found
Our likeness was uncanny and was becoming more profound
We had so much in common - I couldn't believe how much alike,
That I decided to tag along, we continued on our hike
He said he's from all over and his name was just like mine,
And hoped one day that we would meet as he had a real short time
I was feeling sort of baffled, as we went on with our walk
But he had held my interest, so I listened as he talked
He said, I know you're hurting - as your life has been so hard
But it seems today that you found God, where once you'd disregard
From the point that I was calling and was asking for God's hand,
Is the point where he had first appeared, as this was in God’s plan
He said to take more time for prayer - that I could bend God's ear
That He is always listening, and He is always near
God knows about my struggles but better times will be ahead,
As long as I keep believing and will no longer be mislead.
We then turned onto a sidewalk and now very close to home,
And it was then it struck me that I was suddenly now alone.
This stopped me in my tracks and I began to call his name
And it was then I understood, why to me that day he came.
I then realized God had heard me, as my Angel He then sent
To relieve me of my worries, and all my discontent.
Today I pray more often and feel blessed with my God's Love
As He was there and listening - and sent an Angel from above
by Tommy Q
I was walking along a country road one calm and cloudy day
Feeling down about the problems that had seemed to come my way
My pain was very great and my tears I could not hide
And was calling God to help me as I was hurting deep inside
I then thought about what I've believed and how I've rarely called
For sometimes I have wondered if God were there at all
As I lifted up my head and looked down that road a spell
I spotted someone coming - from the distance hard to tell
As he got a little closer I could then see all the signs
Of someone who'd been down that road quite a number of times
His clothes were old and dusty and his shoes were pretty worn
But there seemed a glow about him - at least I could have sworn
His face appeared real friendly as he peered up in the sky
He said, the weather is pretty calm today, hope the rain will pass us by
He first talked about the weather, but there seemed to be much more
That we both had in common, except for what we wore
He started talking about his life and the places he had been
And he spoke as if he knew me, like we were next-of-kin
From the problems that he had, to the happy times he found
Our likeness was uncanny and was becoming more profound
We had so much in common - I couldn't believe how much alike,
That I decided to tag along, we continued on our hike
He said he's from all over and his name was just like mine,
And hoped one day that we would meet as he had a real short time
I was feeling sort of baffled, as we went on with our walk
But he had held my interest, so I listened as he talked
He said, I know you're hurting - as your life has been so hard
But it seems today that you found God, where once you'd disregard
From the point that I was calling and was asking for God's hand,
Is the point where he had first appeared, as this was in God’s plan
He said to take more time for prayer - that I could bend God's ear
That He is always listening, and He is always near
God knows about my struggles but better times will be ahead,
As long as I keep believing and will no longer be mislead.
We then turned onto a sidewalk and now very close to home,
And it was then it struck me that I was suddenly now alone.
This stopped me in my tracks and I began to call his name
And it was then I understood, why to me that day he came.
I then realized God had heard me, as my Angel He then sent
To relieve me of my worries, and all my discontent.
Today I pray more often and feel blessed with my God's Love
As He was there and listening - and sent an Angel from above
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Reflections - Harry Conte
So many times we do not see,
that all of life is a memory:
Of days gone past both bad and good,
and so we dream, as dream we should:
But one should always keep in mind,
that a memory is a day behind:
Live for today with its joy and sorrow,
for today is the memory we dream of tomorrow.
that all of life is a memory:
Of days gone past both bad and good,
and so we dream, as dream we should:
But one should always keep in mind,
that a memory is a day behind:
Live for today with its joy and sorrow,
for today is the memory we dream of tomorrow.
Monday, November 28, 2005
Hope
What is most dear to you? Do you even know? When you lose it or just think you have, that is when the truth is revealed. My roommate told me that my fish died, my 'Hope'. My world crumbled in that moment. For many she is just a fish, mmm sushi they joke. To me she is more than a fish. Her name is Hope, because Hope keeps me going. Everyday keeps going because of the hope that we will all be in heaven, hope that Jesus just might return on this day and I won't have to wonder where I'm going for Christmas, hope that today will glorify him, hope that I'm here for a reason. What if all the hope in the world faded away, died? That is how I felt. That is what happens when you give your fish a name like 'Hope' the time will come when I'll have to face reality that my fish will die, yet another thing to leave me, but I'm promised this 'blessed hope'
"For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say 'No' to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope - the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ" - Titus 2:11-13
"For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say 'No' to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope - the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ" - Titus 2:11-13
Thanksgiving Break Wrap-up!
Friday night: Monika, Brittany and I went to Denver. Brittany's parent's bible study lead by Paul, a man gifted with prophecy (I'm still pondering all he said) Said up talking with B's parents and then bed. (For my sign language class I was silent on Friday, made things even more interesting)
Saturday: Brittany took Monika and me to the airport. I slept the whole plane ride. Mom, dad and Craig greeted me at the airport. We later went for a walk, I cooked some VERY spicy stirfry and watched 'Coach Carter'(not a bad movie)
Sunday: Movie theatre for 'Chicken Little' (a must see, it was too funny, I love the pig!) Grocery shopping. My next door neighbors found out I was home so I played with them for a couple hours.
Monday: Went to my old high school to observe a math teacher, my old volleyball coach. Came back for lunch and help my dad rack the leaves. Back to school for 6th period and a forever long conversation afterward, I always forget that Mr. Healy is a talker.
Tuesday: Oatmeal for breakfast! Listened to music on computer and then chess board shopping with my parents. 1:30 I went to my old elementary school to walk Katie home from school and to see my old 6th grade teacher. I realized how much older I am. I saw my old 6th grade teacher Mr. Raino (the best teacher ever), my 4th grade teacher (she now has a 6 year old, when I had her she wasn't even married!), My 2nd grade teacher and my first grade teacher. They all remembered me and all shared a embarrassing story for Katie to laugh at me for. They all encouraged me for my desire to become a math teacher! For the next couple hours I played with Katie and her sister, that included climbing to the top of the tree in the front of my house. Back home for my mom's pre thanksgiving turkey dinner. Went to a string trio recital in Caldwell. Kent arrived around midnight but I was already in bed.
Wednesday: Breakfast with mom at a cute cafe downtown. Shopping for CD's and clothes, it was a fun time. I convinced my family to go ice skating well all except Kent. It was fun I skated for a straight hour and of course fell on my butt once. Craig gave me and Kent our Christmas presents early. He had messed up on his order of a MP3 player and so we each got one. Sweet because I've been thinking about getting one and so I spent the rest of the evening putting songs on it.
Thursday: Turkey day! Went to grandma's at noon. My aunt Bev and precious arrived a little later with the food. My cousin Lacey and her boyfriend also came. Watched football, ate (real potatoes!), watched more football, played UNO like always, ate pie (YES! My aunt's apple pie!) and called it a night. Watched 'How to Lose a Guy in 10 days'
Friday: Craig and mom went to the mall for fun! I was a sleep of course! Took Katie downtown for the Festival of Trees and then back home. We then took a drive to Bogus, 6000ft elevation mountain? I drove the windy roads and that was fun. Dad made macaroni and Cheese! Watched James Bond movie, Numb3rs and the end of 'Hook'
Saturday:I woke up long enough to see a beautiful sunrise and the freshly fallen snow before falling back asleep. Craig and I fought over sifted flour and then made cookies. We joked the whole time. 12 dozen was the total! The five of us went on a walk which include passing a football around and pushing mom on the swing until she almost vomited. Craig and I slaughtered mom and dad at the game Rook. Learned the lesson that cell phones aren't washable! Packed and watched the Notre Dame/ Stanford football game!
Sunday: woke up at 2 and was to excited to fall asleep. Got ready at 4:30. Got to the airport at 5:30, plane left at 7 and arrived in Denver at 9. Took the 10:20 shuttle back to the Fort.
Saturday: Brittany took Monika and me to the airport. I slept the whole plane ride. Mom, dad and Craig greeted me at the airport. We later went for a walk, I cooked some VERY spicy stirfry and watched 'Coach Carter'(not a bad movie)
Sunday: Movie theatre for 'Chicken Little' (a must see, it was too funny, I love the pig!) Grocery shopping. My next door neighbors found out I was home so I played with them for a couple hours.
Monday: Went to my old high school to observe a math teacher, my old volleyball coach. Came back for lunch and help my dad rack the leaves. Back to school for 6th period and a forever long conversation afterward, I always forget that Mr. Healy is a talker.
Tuesday: Oatmeal for breakfast! Listened to music on computer and then chess board shopping with my parents. 1:30 I went to my old elementary school to walk Katie home from school and to see my old 6th grade teacher. I realized how much older I am. I saw my old 6th grade teacher Mr. Raino (the best teacher ever), my 4th grade teacher (she now has a 6 year old, when I had her she wasn't even married!), My 2nd grade teacher and my first grade teacher. They all remembered me and all shared a embarrassing story for Katie to laugh at me for. They all encouraged me for my desire to become a math teacher! For the next couple hours I played with Katie and her sister, that included climbing to the top of the tree in the front of my house. Back home for my mom's pre thanksgiving turkey dinner. Went to a string trio recital in Caldwell. Kent arrived around midnight but I was already in bed.
Wednesday: Breakfast with mom at a cute cafe downtown. Shopping for CD's and clothes, it was a fun time. I convinced my family to go ice skating well all except Kent. It was fun I skated for a straight hour and of course fell on my butt once. Craig gave me and Kent our Christmas presents early. He had messed up on his order of a MP3 player and so we each got one. Sweet because I've been thinking about getting one and so I spent the rest of the evening putting songs on it.
Thursday: Turkey day! Went to grandma's at noon. My aunt Bev and precious arrived a little later with the food. My cousin Lacey and her boyfriend also came. Watched football, ate (real potatoes!), watched more football, played UNO like always, ate pie (YES! My aunt's apple pie!) and called it a night. Watched 'How to Lose a Guy in 10 days'
Friday: Craig and mom went to the mall for fun! I was a sleep of course! Took Katie downtown for the Festival of Trees and then back home. We then took a drive to Bogus, 6000ft elevation mountain? I drove the windy roads and that was fun. Dad made macaroni and Cheese! Watched James Bond movie, Numb3rs and the end of 'Hook'
Saturday:I woke up long enough to see a beautiful sunrise and the freshly fallen snow before falling back asleep. Craig and I fought over sifted flour and then made cookies. We joked the whole time. 12 dozen was the total! The five of us went on a walk which include passing a football around and pushing mom on the swing until she almost vomited. Craig and I slaughtered mom and dad at the game Rook. Learned the lesson that cell phones aren't washable! Packed and watched the Notre Dame/ Stanford football game!
Sunday: woke up at 2 and was to excited to fall asleep. Got ready at 4:30. Got to the airport at 5:30, plane left at 7 and arrived in Denver at 9. Took the 10:20 shuttle back to the Fort.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Let go of the edge
Have you ever been Ice Skating? I went on my second try today and I must say there is a valuable lesson to be learned. The only way to get better is to get away from the edge and brave the open ice.
How often does God calls us to do something and we just run to the safety edge where we know that we won't fall, where no body well come along and knock us down. I cry out for freedom but when he gives it to me I run cause I'm blind of the gifts and strengths he has given me. Yes we will fall as I did today but it really doesn't hurt that bad compared to the lost opportunity to see if you could do it.
How often does God calls us to do something and we just run to the safety edge where we know that we won't fall, where no body well come along and knock us down. I cry out for freedom but when he gives it to me I run cause I'm blind of the gifts and strengths he has given me. Yes we will fall as I did today but it really doesn't hurt that bad compared to the lost opportunity to see if you could do it.
Monday, November 21, 2005
Jesus my Groom
I wrote this last fall, during one of my alone times with God and a guitar. It's about the love I've found in Jesus.
My heart was cold and empty
I was hungry and in search of love
In search of a man like the movies
to love me, care for me until
I am old and gray
I hope to find a man that would
give me all I wanted
who would make me happier and hold me tight
we would have beautiful children and live in
a perfect little home
But to my surprise
the man I would fall in love with
was more than I imagined
He has loved me from the beginning
despite all my faults, and imperfections
I never thought that
the one I ignored
the one I denied
the one I despised
would be the one I would love
Now I will dedicate myself to you
Give you all I have
because it was your grace that saved me
Now I live by a new plan
Jesus I long to be your bride
Whisk me away on your mighty stallion
ride me off into the sunset of my dreams
and we can live happily ever after
in your mighty kingdom, that I call home
My heart was cold and empty
I was hungry and in search of love
In search of a man like the movies
to love me, care for me until
I am old and gray
I hope to find a man that would
give me all I wanted
who would make me happier and hold me tight
we would have beautiful children and live in
a perfect little home
But to my surprise
the man I would fall in love with
was more than I imagined
He has loved me from the beginning
despite all my faults, and imperfections
I never thought that
the one I ignored
the one I denied
the one I despised
would be the one I would love
Now I will dedicate myself to you
Give you all I have
because it was your grace that saved me
Now I live by a new plan
Jesus I long to be your bride
Whisk me away on your mighty stallion
ride me off into the sunset of my dreams
and we can live happily ever after
in your mighty kingdom, that I call home
Friday, November 18, 2005
Message of Love
Yesterday I was walking to class listening to the Building 429 CD and "No one Else Knows" played. It was one of those I've listened to this song a couple times before but now, this moment in time it resonates with me. I had to stop and soak it in, I was only a little late to class.
"I have come to you in search of faith
Cause I can’t see beyond this place
Oh You are God and I am man
So I’ll leave it in Your hands"
I try not to give songs too much great, or use them as my only link to God. But there are those verses like the above one that are just poetic versions of my own prayer. I could ramble on but there aren't words to express or explain what God has been telling me this week. A message of love despite of me, I'll I have to do is leave my life in his hands.
"I have come to you in search of faith
Cause I can’t see beyond this place
Oh You are God and I am man
So I’ll leave it in Your hands"
I try not to give songs too much great, or use them as my only link to God. But there are those verses like the above one that are just poetic versions of my own prayer. I could ramble on but there aren't words to express or explain what God has been telling me this week. A message of love despite of me, I'll I have to do is leave my life in his hands.
No One Else Knows -Building429
My world is closing in
On the inside
But I’m not showing it
When all I am is crying out
I hold it in and fake a smile
Still I’m broken
I’m broken
Only one can understand
And only one can hold the hand
Of the broken
Of the broken
When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in your arms
Again
I need no explanation of why me
I just need confirmation
Only You could understand the emptiness inside my head
I am falling
I am falling
I’m falling down upon my knees
To find the one who gives me peace
I am flying
Lord I am flying
When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in Your arms
Again
I have come to you in search of faith
Cause I can’t see beyond this place
Oh You are God and I am man
So I’ll leave it in Your hands
On the inside
But I’m not showing it
When all I am is crying out
I hold it in and fake a smile
Still I’m broken
I’m broken
Only one can understand
And only one can hold the hand
Of the broken
Of the broken
When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in your arms
Again
I need no explanation of why me
I just need confirmation
Only You could understand the emptiness inside my head
I am falling
I am falling
I’m falling down upon my knees
To find the one who gives me peace
I am flying
Lord I am flying
When no one else knows how I feel
Your love for me is proven real
When no one else cares where I’ve been
You run to me with outstretched hands
And You hold me in Your arms
Again
I have come to you in search of faith
Cause I can’t see beyond this place
Oh You are God and I am man
So I’ll leave it in Your hands
Monday, November 14, 2005
His Love Endures Forever
So I went to the ER last night because of Chest pain, but no worries because it was just heart burn! While there my friend Katie brought me my bible. Delightfully I flipped to the psalms. Katie's Fav being 136. To sum it up "His Love Endures Forever" And it does. I sat there as my friends took turns visiting me all with the same worried face and the same question "are you all right" and all finishing with the same statement "I love you". The doctor began to joke with me that the waiting room was getting overcrowded with my fan club! He was a funny one, nickenamed the "clown". Reminded me of an Indian version of Patch Adams. If he didn't know what was wrong with you medically he could at least make you smile. He said something that stuck with me in the since of a conviction. "Be thankful" he said. give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. -1 Thes 5:18 It is a blessing that I have so many that love and care for me. Even to the point that they wouldn't believe I was alright unless they saw me in person. I am thankful, I am thankful that they love me. But at the same time I'm even more thankful for God's love for me. God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. - Psalm 46:1 (I randomily chose as I was lying in my hospital bed). During the whole event God was there as my refuge and strength, from beginning of the pain to when all the EMT's and firemen came into my room to the ambulance ride, through all the tests and even now hours after the ordeal. He still loves me, no more no less.
So now even after all of that I still have to take a test this evening, Crud! But thankful because God is with me!
Thanks for all the prayers! I may be stubborn but I do need you all at times so thankyou.
So now even after all of that I still have to take a test this evening, Crud! But thankful because God is with me!
Thanks for all the prayers! I may be stubborn but I do need you all at times so thankyou.
Friday, November 11, 2005
11:11.11 on 11/11 PRAISE GOD!!!
I just happened to take a glance at my clock at just the right moment!
So what am I thankful for:
-I'm thankful for the glorious sunrise this morning, the couple seconds I saw before falling right back asleep
-I'm thankful for Angie and the wonderful breakfast with her
-I'm thankful for my many jobs
-I'm thankful for my parents allowing me to go to CSU
-I'm thankful for the hard lessons
-I'm thaknful for the beep-beep of the card reader at the dorms, and the beep-clunk! of the card rereader at work
-I'm thankful for warm/cold/warm/cold showers
-Im thankful for tater tots
-I'm thankful that I'll be home in 8 days
-I'm thankful for all the brothers and sisters God has blessed me with
-I'm thankful that You(God) love me
-I'm thankful that Jesus died for my sins, rose in 3 days and now waits for my arrival and until then has blessed me with the Holy Spirit
-I'm thankful that God's word runs through my head
-I'm thankful for this life and the purpose you have for it
So what am I thankful for:
-I'm thankful for the glorious sunrise this morning, the couple seconds I saw before falling right back asleep
-I'm thankful for Angie and the wonderful breakfast with her
-I'm thankful for my many jobs
-I'm thankful for my parents allowing me to go to CSU
-I'm thankful for the hard lessons
-I'm thaknful for the beep-beep of the card reader at the dorms, and the beep-clunk! of the card rereader at work
-I'm thankful for warm/cold/warm/cold showers
-Im thankful for tater tots
-I'm thankful that I'll be home in 8 days
-I'm thankful for all the brothers and sisters God has blessed me with
-I'm thankful that You(God) love me
-I'm thankful that Jesus died for my sins, rose in 3 days and now waits for my arrival and until then has blessed me with the Holy Spirit
-I'm thankful that God's word runs through my head
-I'm thankful for this life and the purpose you have for it
Minesweeper or Mindsweeper
I confess my addiction to the game of Minesweeper. Sitting hours in front of a computer in the labs often results in me participating in the mind draining game of minesweeper. Once a game that challenged my mind has now turned into one that turns my brain to mush not to mention there is nothing gained only a loss. If there was a way that I could delete it from the computer that would be a life saver. But that leads me to where God fits in this whole story. I'm referring to thoses struggles and situations when we wish we could just delete the thoughts, delete the mistakes, delete the situation that we don't want to face. But rather than deleting God gives us the courage and strength to overcome. To be self controlled. We are going to have to have those hard conversations, we are going to have to overcome those temptations. We aren't promised to be free from these things but instead give them up to God (prevent anxiety, Phil 4), seek his guidance, accept his Spirit of power and rejoice in the suffering because we are being obedient.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Prayer
"Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful." Colossians 4:2
So I decided for some random reason to read colossians today. Oh boy did God bless that decision. One of the verses that really jumped out was 4:2
Ok devote yourself to prayer, I've heard that before, I'm not perfect at it but I try. But we are also called to be watchful. Watchful?!?! I took that to mean watch how God answers prayers. We are suppose to pray with the belief that we will be answered so why not watch. Why not watch to see how God answers the prayer. Open our hearts and minds to the way God works, to see that he answers the prayers but not in the way we expect.
and be thankful. Thankful for the answered prayer.
So pray, watch to see how God answered it and be thankful for when he does.
So I decided for some random reason to read colossians today. Oh boy did God bless that decision. One of the verses that really jumped out was 4:2
Ok devote yourself to prayer, I've heard that before, I'm not perfect at it but I try. But we are also called to be watchful. Watchful?!?! I took that to mean watch how God answers prayers. We are suppose to pray with the belief that we will be answered so why not watch. Why not watch to see how God answers the prayer. Open our hearts and minds to the way God works, to see that he answers the prayers but not in the way we expect.
and be thankful. Thankful for the answered prayer.
So pray, watch to see how God answered it and be thankful for when he does.
Monday, November 07, 2005
Emotional wreck
It's amazing how quickly I can turn into a emotional basketcase. I went for a short walk last night to a wooded area near the dorms, that I would go to last year all the time. Last time I was there was at the beginnning of year. Well things have changed. Normally I go to this one stump and ponder things through with God but last night I arrived to discover that my much loved stump was gone! To you all this may be a silly thing to get worked up over, but for me it was an important part of my life, something that was not suppose to change, it was a security. When the world was spinning around me it would sometimes be the one thing standing still. Now it is gone! Oh boy did I get worked up. More faith in a stump! I cried to God about everything because I was convinced that I had no faith, convinced that God didn't care to answer my prayers. Back at the dorms I cried out to Liz, emotional as ever, not allowing the truth she was speaking to settle. I stormed off only to be confronted with Emily's Holy Spirit. There I had to confess that I was allowing Satan to tell me lies, confess that I was running from the body and not letting my brothers and sisters help me. Off into a quiet place by myself with God was her perscription. There I found peace.
So what is to be learned of this story. Well I learned that it is so tempting to run from the body, thinking that they don't carry. Really your just letting the devil have a foothold which is wrong (Eph. 4:27). When you are struggling let your brothers and sisters bear with you only then will you taste true peace.
So what is to be learned of this story. Well I learned that it is so tempting to run from the body, thinking that they don't carry. Really your just letting the devil have a foothold which is wrong (Eph. 4:27). When you are struggling let your brothers and sisters bear with you only then will you taste true peace.
Friday, November 04, 2005
God is everything and everything else
A journal entry:
But God didn't promise an easy life. He did promise a life not without him. He is that hand to hold when dad tightens the braces, he is that friend to hug when your world is falling apart, he is that tissue that catches every tear, he is that bear to squeeze when scared, he is that blanket to warm when the world hits you cold, he is that fish that listens to every word without judgment, he is that story that made be want to become a princess in my peaceful dreams, he is that nightlight that makes me feel safe, he is that counselor that tells you what you need to do to make things right, he is that parent that gives you all you need and want, he is that letter from a teacher that inspires you to be all you want to be, he is that lover that just enjoys painting a sunset just to see you smile, he is that empty room that always reveals the true self, he is the perfect being that one looks up to. God is everything and everything else.
But God didn't promise an easy life. He did promise a life not without him. He is that hand to hold when dad tightens the braces, he is that friend to hug when your world is falling apart, he is that tissue that catches every tear, he is that bear to squeeze when scared, he is that blanket to warm when the world hits you cold, he is that fish that listens to every word without judgment, he is that story that made be want to become a princess in my peaceful dreams, he is that nightlight that makes me feel safe, he is that counselor that tells you what you need to do to make things right, he is that parent that gives you all you need and want, he is that letter from a teacher that inspires you to be all you want to be, he is that lover that just enjoys painting a sunset just to see you smile, he is that empty room that always reveals the true self, he is the perfect being that one looks up to. God is everything and everything else.
I speak the truth, but I don't like it
I hate it when my ownself erks me. I hate it when it's clearly all my fault. I hate it when I sin, when I'm disobedient and when I'm complacent. I hate that all I can do is cry out to God, asking why do I do it? No condemnation just peace. But again I'm not perfect. My intial reaction to failure is condemnation. That is why I ask to be filled with the Spirit so that I don't mess up to begin with and secondly so that if I do I will be filled with peace.
Walking to class yesterday (answer to pray, I went to every class despite the MANY temptations, Praise God) I was reading the Collegian to see what these reporters consider important news. The first article was about that house church group that sets up a table on the plaza. It's amazing how much talk there is about God and Christianity, it makes my heart beat faster. The second article was about Harvey Milk Day. I knew this article would come because I was quoted after an enjoying half hour long conversation with Andy. I learned alot yesterday. I read the article and reaching my quote something in me turned over(not the eggs I had for breakfast but my Spirit)
I'll quote myself again, "I don't know what it's like to be discriminated against." How could I say that, better yet why is it true?
Luke 21:17 All men will hate you because of me.
John 7:7 The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that what it does is evil.
Matthew 10:22 All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved.
Mark 13:13 All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved.
Luke 6:22 Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man.
Matthew 24:9 Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me.
I should be discriminated against. discrimination is treatment based on one's class. I am a citizen of Heaven, I am a follower of Jesus. What about the scriptures? Why don't I face discrimination everyday because I'm a Christian? Why am I not persecuted here? seriously! I won't except that it is hard to be a Christian in America, it only is because we aren't being real Christians, we are complacent. I am a sleep and I want to be awoken! I want to be on fire for Christ. I wanted be like those Jesus speaks of, handed over to be persecuted and put to death...because of him. I'm not asking to be persecuted just for the sake of persecution but because I want to glorify God. I want my faith and obedience to be so strong that the world hates me, trully can't stand me and my odor.
14But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him. 15For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. 16To the one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life. And who is equal to such a task? 17Unlike so many, we do not peddle the word of God for profit. On the contrary, in Christ we speak before God with sincerity, like men sent from God. - 2 Corinthians 2:14-17
Like men sent from God, I want those around me to know that I follow Chirst, I want my presense to shake people. I want to be a fork in the road. Either people run to God or run from God because of my testimony!
My prayer: God I pray for the opportunity to die to myself today, the opportunity to chose you above this world. I pray for my day as I am going and coming, you are watching over all my actions and you will never forsake me, thank you. But God I want to be used by you, I want to be exausted for you at the end of the day. God I pray for guidance and for the increase of faith. I desire not to just speak of persecution but to experience it as well.
Walking to class yesterday (answer to pray, I went to every class despite the MANY temptations, Praise God) I was reading the Collegian to see what these reporters consider important news. The first article was about that house church group that sets up a table on the plaza. It's amazing how much talk there is about God and Christianity, it makes my heart beat faster. The second article was about Harvey Milk Day. I knew this article would come because I was quoted after an enjoying half hour long conversation with Andy. I learned alot yesterday. I read the article and reaching my quote something in me turned over(not the eggs I had for breakfast but my Spirit)
I'll quote myself again, "I don't know what it's like to be discriminated against." How could I say that, better yet why is it true?
Luke 21:17 All men will hate you because of me.
John 7:7 The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify that what it does is evil.
Matthew 10:22 All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved.
Mark 13:13 All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved.
Luke 6:22 Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man.
Matthew 24:9 Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me.
I should be discriminated against. discrimination is treatment based on one's class. I am a citizen of Heaven, I am a follower of Jesus. What about the scriptures? Why don't I face discrimination everyday because I'm a Christian? Why am I not persecuted here? seriously! I won't except that it is hard to be a Christian in America, it only is because we aren't being real Christians, we are complacent. I am a sleep and I want to be awoken! I want to be on fire for Christ. I wanted be like those Jesus speaks of, handed over to be persecuted and put to death...because of him. I'm not asking to be persecuted just for the sake of persecution but because I want to glorify God. I want my faith and obedience to be so strong that the world hates me, trully can't stand me and my odor.
14But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him. 15For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. 16To the one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life. And who is equal to such a task? 17Unlike so many, we do not peddle the word of God for profit. On the contrary, in Christ we speak before God with sincerity, like men sent from God. - 2 Corinthians 2:14-17
Like men sent from God, I want those around me to know that I follow Chirst, I want my presense to shake people. I want to be a fork in the road. Either people run to God or run from God because of my testimony!
My prayer: God I pray for the opportunity to die to myself today, the opportunity to chose you above this world. I pray for my day as I am going and coming, you are watching over all my actions and you will never forsake me, thank you. But God I want to be used by you, I want to be exausted for you at the end of the day. God I pray for guidance and for the increase of faith. I desire not to just speak of persecution but to experience it as well.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
John 12:24
This is for you Eddie, thanks for sparking the joyful discussion at dinner.
"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life." - John 12:24
In order to produce fruit, in order to follow Christ we must die. We must die to ourselves.
“Whoever desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel’s will save it." Mark 8:34-35(New King James)
Do you desire to follow Christ, do you desire to do God's Will? Then you my brother must die, you my sister must die.
"These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. For people who speak thus make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return. But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city." Hebrews 11:13-16(ESV)
We should keep our eyes fixed on our true home. If we do, the lives we have here look less desirable. Oh the joy of that thought!
I was told the other day to stay joyful, I struggled with this truth because at the time I was in much anguish, anguish over this world. I was sick of it and its lies. How could I found joy in this moment. The joy to be found was that Christ died for us and is calling us to die to ourselves. Peace is not in this world it is in the place to come. Praise God for his word, for his faithfulness and for the beautiful God that he is.
I leave you with this challenge and question. First memorize scripture, memorize the truths that God has given us because they will protect us from the lies that Satan tries to push into our minds. They will remind us of the joy that we have in Christ.
And the question is: How have you died today?(Let God answer what that means)
Praise God for the Saints he puts in my life.
"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life." - John 12:24
In order to produce fruit, in order to follow Christ we must die. We must die to ourselves.
“Whoever desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake and the gospel’s will save it." Mark 8:34-35(New King James)
Do you desire to follow Christ, do you desire to do God's Will? Then you my brother must die, you my sister must die.
"These all died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. For people who speak thus make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. If they had been thinking of that land from which they had gone out, they would have had opportunity to return. But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city." Hebrews 11:13-16(ESV)
We should keep our eyes fixed on our true home. If we do, the lives we have here look less desirable. Oh the joy of that thought!
I was told the other day to stay joyful, I struggled with this truth because at the time I was in much anguish, anguish over this world. I was sick of it and its lies. How could I found joy in this moment. The joy to be found was that Christ died for us and is calling us to die to ourselves. Peace is not in this world it is in the place to come. Praise God for his word, for his faithfulness and for the beautiful God that he is.
I leave you with this challenge and question. First memorize scripture, memorize the truths that God has given us because they will protect us from the lies that Satan tries to push into our minds. They will remind us of the joy that we have in Christ.
And the question is: How have you died today?(Let God answer what that means)
Praise God for the Saints he puts in my life.
Monday, October 24, 2005
Trust God
Wait! What? I have to trust God?
Until now I've just been "trusting" God really I trust myself and when things work out I say "Praise God" But now I have to trust completely.
Basically I won't get my heart's desires unless I trust him completely. I have no control. I found out this weekend that if I'm going to go to India, I'm going to have to trust God will provide the money. I work but that money is going to pay for my education, another thing that I'm going to have to trust God with! Oh boy! I cried because I was told by my parents that I can't use my own money, but really I was crying because I had to release my control to God. If God provides I go, if not I don't, it's that simple. The agony that my pride is going through!
Until now I've just been "trusting" God really I trust myself and when things work out I say "Praise God" But now I have to trust completely.
Basically I won't get my heart's desires unless I trust him completely. I have no control. I found out this weekend that if I'm going to go to India, I'm going to have to trust God will provide the money. I work but that money is going to pay for my education, another thing that I'm going to have to trust God with! Oh boy! I cried because I was told by my parents that I can't use my own money, but really I was crying because I had to release my control to God. If God provides I go, if not I don't, it's that simple. The agony that my pride is going through!
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
God is Real
This week I've been learning that God is Real, what John Meyer has been saying at church is true. Through the many stories of faith God has shared with me, I'm believing more and more.
The reason I write tonight is because of the most recent experience. This evening I went to the Strength Team at Summitview. Normally we go Wednesday nights to babysit at the church but the Strength Team is at the church until Sunday. It is a group of VERY muscular men who do feats of strength but at the same time they share the gospel.
I was a little iffy of what they were to do but that is just part of the story, my lack of faith. Even sitting there I had many doubts. Doubts that this was an effect means of ministry, doubts that this is the right way, doubts that people will hear the gospel, doubts that these guys were really Christians, doubts that this is just another "American Christian" style of event, doubts that God would be mentioned but not the focus, I even began to doubt Summitview's beliefs because they were supporting this. I had such a small about of faith but God is real.
Later into the event my heart changed. The testimonies and what the guys said started to make me think. It was during one of the prayers that God really should me that he was there and that he was real. The lead guy, Mike, asked people during prayer to raise their hands if they wanted him to pray for them. If they were to accept Christ for the first time or just rededicate their lives to him. I was at the same time praying for at least a couple to raise their hands. God specifically put the 2 grandparents sitting behind us on my heart, I didn't know why. After the prayer Mike asked those to come forward if they accepted Christ or recommitted their lives to Christ. It was the alter call. My first time witnessing one and so God became as really as ever that next minute as I watched so many walk to the front. I would say 30 or so. Of course along with the mass were the 2 grandparents sitting behind me. What! Could it be! God is Real!
The reason I write tonight is because of the most recent experience. This evening I went to the Strength Team at Summitview. Normally we go Wednesday nights to babysit at the church but the Strength Team is at the church until Sunday. It is a group of VERY muscular men who do feats of strength but at the same time they share the gospel.
I was a little iffy of what they were to do but that is just part of the story, my lack of faith. Even sitting there I had many doubts. Doubts that this was an effect means of ministry, doubts that this is the right way, doubts that people will hear the gospel, doubts that these guys were really Christians, doubts that this is just another "American Christian" style of event, doubts that God would be mentioned but not the focus, I even began to doubt Summitview's beliefs because they were supporting this. I had such a small about of faith but God is real.
Later into the event my heart changed. The testimonies and what the guys said started to make me think. It was during one of the prayers that God really should me that he was there and that he was real. The lead guy, Mike, asked people during prayer to raise their hands if they wanted him to pray for them. If they were to accept Christ for the first time or just rededicate their lives to him. I was at the same time praying for at least a couple to raise their hands. God specifically put the 2 grandparents sitting behind us on my heart, I didn't know why. After the prayer Mike asked those to come forward if they accepted Christ or recommitted their lives to Christ. It was the alter call. My first time witnessing one and so God became as really as ever that next minute as I watched so many walk to the front. I would say 30 or so. Of course along with the mass were the 2 grandparents sitting behind me. What! Could it be! God is Real!
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Walk by Faith and Trust me!
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship - Romans 12:1
Sitting in Matrices class today I knew I had planned to meet with Lesley to share the gospel but I kept thinking of excuses to not go. There was a lot on my mind, my heart wasn't on the lost, I was getting a stomach ache and I just wanted to take a nap but I still made my way to meet her after class. She read me Romans 12. A living sacrifice. God, You want me to sacrifice my time for you. Okay fine, lets walk by faith. After praying and reading 2 Tim 1:7-9 I was ready to go.
At the beginning of the day I knew today wasn't going to be a normal Tuesday, God was going to do something big today.
Entering the plaza we just stood in the middle and closed our eyes hoping for a tug. Testing my faith. About a minute later I hear "Abra". It's Sam Mast. So the three of us chatted. He explained how he didn't understand what he was study, didn't understand how there can be such finite numbers for something we can barely see. We are taught to accept some truths by faith. That's the same with Christianity, walk by faith. We asked him where we should go and he told us the engineering building. I confess I didn't want to go because I was so set on the small area of the plaza and I believed for some reason nobody in the engineering building would be free to listen to us. "Trust me, walk by faith" God said in my ear and so we changed direction and found ourselves talking to a girl. Invited her to church, gave her a bible and prayed she would come to know Jesus as more than just a man.
After praying Lesley suggested the oval and that the next person we talked to we would ask them where to go next, like a scavenger hunt. Upon approaching the oval there appeared to only be surveyors but God shined a light on a figure way up a head. We got closer and discovered it was a young man with bible open and praying. But He came up from his prayer and we shared what we were up to. Joseph was his name. He told us his story of leaving school and going to the house of prayer and than found himself called to come to Colorado and here he was checking out the campus. He eagerly joined us for the next couple hours. 2 conversations later, much time in prayer and listening to what the Lord has been teaching him I had to leave for class. I wanted to share this story with you all because I learned a lot about faith today. And by walking in faith God blessed me with this encouraging brother that might even join us for small group on Thursday.
Looking back I almost chose to take a nap rather than watch God work in amazing ways.
Oh and have you read the Colligian today? There is an article that explains how there can only be one right religion. If you read the opinion section there is often a article that shares truth, really! Praise God that these articles are being printed.
Sitting in Matrices class today I knew I had planned to meet with Lesley to share the gospel but I kept thinking of excuses to not go. There was a lot on my mind, my heart wasn't on the lost, I was getting a stomach ache and I just wanted to take a nap but I still made my way to meet her after class. She read me Romans 12. A living sacrifice. God, You want me to sacrifice my time for you. Okay fine, lets walk by faith. After praying and reading 2 Tim 1:7-9 I was ready to go.
At the beginning of the day I knew today wasn't going to be a normal Tuesday, God was going to do something big today.
Entering the plaza we just stood in the middle and closed our eyes hoping for a tug. Testing my faith. About a minute later I hear "Abra". It's Sam Mast. So the three of us chatted. He explained how he didn't understand what he was study, didn't understand how there can be such finite numbers for something we can barely see. We are taught to accept some truths by faith. That's the same with Christianity, walk by faith. We asked him where we should go and he told us the engineering building. I confess I didn't want to go because I was so set on the small area of the plaza and I believed for some reason nobody in the engineering building would be free to listen to us. "Trust me, walk by faith" God said in my ear and so we changed direction and found ourselves talking to a girl. Invited her to church, gave her a bible and prayed she would come to know Jesus as more than just a man.
After praying Lesley suggested the oval and that the next person we talked to we would ask them where to go next, like a scavenger hunt. Upon approaching the oval there appeared to only be surveyors but God shined a light on a figure way up a head. We got closer and discovered it was a young man with bible open and praying. But He came up from his prayer and we shared what we were up to. Joseph was his name. He told us his story of leaving school and going to the house of prayer and than found himself called to come to Colorado and here he was checking out the campus. He eagerly joined us for the next couple hours. 2 conversations later, much time in prayer and listening to what the Lord has been teaching him I had to leave for class. I wanted to share this story with you all because I learned a lot about faith today. And by walking in faith God blessed me with this encouraging brother that might even join us for small group on Thursday.
Looking back I almost chose to take a nap rather than watch God work in amazing ways.
Oh and have you read the Colligian today? There is an article that explains how there can only be one right religion. If you read the opinion section there is often a article that shares truth, really! Praise God that these articles are being printed.
Monday, October 17, 2005
Give it your all or not at all
When presented with the idea to raise money to provide help for the needy, I feel like I have one of two options. Either Give all or not at all. If I'm going to give $20 why not $100 or even more. Kashmir needs help, they need tents and blankets and supplies and love. I'm told this and than find myself contemlating what do I do. What does God want me to do. Give up what is not important in my life, or are those blessings that I should be thankful for. We are to be content at all times. But I'm not content. Not content to give a little while I live in a life of luxury but I also won't be content if I don't obey God. What does God want? Pray Pray Pray
Friday, October 14, 2005
Missions!
There is something about the word that both excites me and terrifies me. The thrill of traveling and sharing the gospel in a new place. But yet the fear that I'll be persecuted or unprepared. Cast all your anxieties on him. As Jesus looked at the Joy set before him, let us look at the joy set before us! Doing God's will that is our mission. Here is some news that hit me, we are already on the mission field! Called to share his word, keep his praise on our lips, walk in his light, train ourselves in his word, pray always and trust him entirely.
"Missions in other countries aren't for me, that is for somebody else to do, but that's okay because I'll pray for them" These words are my own, If I was asked why I don't want to go to another country for mission work this would have been my answer.
1. How do I know it's not for me?
2. Who is this somebody else? If everybody said this than who would actually go
3. How much do I really pray for other mission trips? really? Don't I often pray for myself, than friends and family, and than whatever big event is happening, and than ... How often do I pray for the world? And when I do, how often are they small prayers and mostly only when something big happens? If I'm going to use pray as an excuse than I need to really pray.
Here is a thought that struck me last night. What if we switiched everything, flipped it all around. What if we saw the states as just another country! Imagine if you were in Pakistan right now, or wherever. Imagine you lived there all your life and somebody asked you to go on a mission trip to the US. Would you go? and if so why? Is it the worldly luxuries, the comforts, the lack of persecution, the chance to live a "good" christian life and not to be living day by day trusting God for every need.
"Some do have to stay in the US" Okay. But what makes you think that is where God wants you? Rather than waiting for the call to go on a mission trip how about we wait on a call to stay. If God wants you to stay than he'll stop you from going. For me I'm planning to go. I don't know yet where but out of here.
Here is another thought. America has heard the gospel. Wouldn't it be a big testimony if we left to go on a mission trip, leaving behind the comforts of the states. Trully living for God that is my desire.
The end of my ramblings, But if you really want to know what God has in store for your life ask him and read his word.
This verse grabbed me:
"How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!" Romans 10:14-15
"Missions in other countries aren't for me, that is for somebody else to do, but that's okay because I'll pray for them" These words are my own, If I was asked why I don't want to go to another country for mission work this would have been my answer.
1. How do I know it's not for me?
2. Who is this somebody else? If everybody said this than who would actually go
3. How much do I really pray for other mission trips? really? Don't I often pray for myself, than friends and family, and than whatever big event is happening, and than ... How often do I pray for the world? And when I do, how often are they small prayers and mostly only when something big happens? If I'm going to use pray as an excuse than I need to really pray.
Here is a thought that struck me last night. What if we switiched everything, flipped it all around. What if we saw the states as just another country! Imagine if you were in Pakistan right now, or wherever. Imagine you lived there all your life and somebody asked you to go on a mission trip to the US. Would you go? and if so why? Is it the worldly luxuries, the comforts, the lack of persecution, the chance to live a "good" christian life and not to be living day by day trusting God for every need.
"Some do have to stay in the US" Okay. But what makes you think that is where God wants you? Rather than waiting for the call to go on a mission trip how about we wait on a call to stay. If God wants you to stay than he'll stop you from going. For me I'm planning to go. I don't know yet where but out of here.
Here is another thought. America has heard the gospel. Wouldn't it be a big testimony if we left to go on a mission trip, leaving behind the comforts of the states. Trully living for God that is my desire.
The end of my ramblings, But if you really want to know what God has in store for your life ask him and read his word.
This verse grabbed me:
"How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!" Romans 10:14-15
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Lost in a sea of faces
Walking through the plaza on my way to class this song played on the radio. It clicked with the feeling that I was experiencing that moment in time. I have felt feelings of not fitting in before, all of my life actually. One reason to leave Idaho was to start over hoping that I would fit in some where. Well I still don't fit in but this time for a better reason, because I don't belong in this world. As I sit in class I realize how temporarily my time on earth is, it makes it hard to go to class cause I just want to live and explore what the Lord has made. I than walk through the plaza passing many that I don't know and don't know me. The strange feeling that everybody else knows something I don't or are being guided by something different than me. Like a leaf falling off a tree I wonder if they would even notice my frail body lying under their feet. But I'm not a leaf that gets torn up by this world, withered by time. I'm that leaf that caused me to bend down and grab a hold of. God chose me out of a million faces. Jesus died just so that I wouldn't be lost in the sea of faces, in the piles of leaves. Praise his Name!
"Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise - the fruit of lips that confess his name." - Hebrews 13:15
"Sea Of Faces" - Kutless
I see the city lights all around me
Everyone's obscure
Ten million people each with their problems
Why should anyone care
And in Your eyes I can see
I am not just a man, vastly lost in this world
Lost in a Sea of Faces
Your body's the bread, Your blood is the wine
Because you traded Your life for mine
Sometimes my life it feels so trivial
Immersed in the greatness of space
Yet somehow you still find the time for me
It's then You show me Your love
And In Your eyes I can see
And in Your arms I will be
I am not just a man, vastly lost in this world
Lost in a Sea of Faces
Your body's the bread, Your blood is the wine
Because you traded Your life for mine
If only my one heart
Was all you'd gain from all it cost
Well I know you would have still been a man
With a reason
To willingly offer your life
I am not just a man, vastly lost in this world
Lost in a Sea of Faces
Your body's the bread, Your blood is the wine
Because you traded Your life for mine
Just one in a million faces
***A gift for those who read to the bottom***
I also learned the sign for respect and the sign for honor and the sign for hero. All look up to the skies, to the heavens, to my God. Whom I desire to respect and honor and always look to as my hero. "A person noted for feats of courage or nobility of purpose, especially one who has risked or sacrificed his or her life" Is not Jesus the best example of a hero?
"Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise - the fruit of lips that confess his name." - Hebrews 13:15
"Sea Of Faces" - Kutless
I see the city lights all around me
Everyone's obscure
Ten million people each with their problems
Why should anyone care
And in Your eyes I can see
I am not just a man, vastly lost in this world
Lost in a Sea of Faces
Your body's the bread, Your blood is the wine
Because you traded Your life for mine
Sometimes my life it feels so trivial
Immersed in the greatness of space
Yet somehow you still find the time for me
It's then You show me Your love
And In Your eyes I can see
And in Your arms I will be
I am not just a man, vastly lost in this world
Lost in a Sea of Faces
Your body's the bread, Your blood is the wine
Because you traded Your life for mine
If only my one heart
Was all you'd gain from all it cost
Well I know you would have still been a man
With a reason
To willingly offer your life
I am not just a man, vastly lost in this world
Lost in a Sea of Faces
Your body's the bread, Your blood is the wine
Because you traded Your life for mine
Just one in a million faces
***A gift for those who read to the bottom***
I also learned the sign for respect and the sign for honor and the sign for hero. All look up to the skies, to the heavens, to my God. Whom I desire to respect and honor and always look to as my hero. "A person noted for feats of courage or nobility of purpose, especially one who has risked or sacrificed his or her life" Is not Jesus the best example of a hero?
Monday, October 10, 2005
With a Song I Greeted the Day
I awoke this morning with this song on my lips and there it stayed through the day. God will be with me through all times and I will never be separated from him. He is my heart's desire and he is above all else.
"As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after Thee
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee
Chorus
You alone are my strength, my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee
You're my friend and you are my brother
Even though you are a king
I love you more than any other
So much more than anything
Chorus
I want you more than gold or silver
Only you can satisfy
You alone are the real joy giver
And the apple of my eye
Chorus"
"As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after Thee
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee
Chorus
You alone are my strength, my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee
You're my friend and you are my brother
Even though you are a king
I love you more than any other
So much more than anything
Chorus
I want you more than gold or silver
Only you can satisfy
You alone are the real joy giver
And the apple of my eye
Chorus"
Friday, October 07, 2005
What if?
What if we all walked by the same beat?
Different paces, different paths
But the same beat
Different voices, different songs
But the same beat
What if we all moved by the same wind?
Some rustle, some sway
But the same wind
Some leaves, some grass
But the same wind
What if we all lived by the same source?
Both water and bread
But the same source
Only way, only satisfaction
Same source of life
Different paces, different paths
But the same beat
Different voices, different songs
But the same beat
What if we all moved by the same wind?
Some rustle, some sway
But the same wind
Some leaves, some grass
But the same wind
What if we all lived by the same source?
Both water and bread
But the same source
Only way, only satisfaction
Same source of life
Honor your parents
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise— Eph 6:1-2
I was reminded last night to honor my parents and than this verse came to me in an email. My parents pretty much are paying for my college right now, everything. I thank them and than seem to forget about the gift. Every class one skips costs money, not mine but my parents. By not going to class it's like I'm not honoring my parents. I've been praying for a desire to learn and to go to class. This is somewhat of an answer because I want to honor my parents.
I was reminded last night to honor my parents and than this verse came to me in an email. My parents pretty much are paying for my college right now, everything. I thank them and than seem to forget about the gift. Every class one skips costs money, not mine but my parents. By not going to class it's like I'm not honoring my parents. I've been praying for a desire to learn and to go to class. This is somewhat of an answer because I want to honor my parents.
Thursday, October 06, 2005
Pains
Watching 2 sisters last night suffering with pains not completely known, my heart ached. Ached for them to get better and be relieved of their pain. I wanted to take their pain, I wanted to carry their burden because I didn't want them to suffer. I wanted to do what Galatians 6 tells us "Carry each other's burdens" But I'm confident that this isn't what God meant. I don't know what God means in Galatians that is something else to pray about. I do know that Christ died for all(1Peter3:18) and I know he endured for us(Hebrews12:3) and I know he suffered and I know that God gave up his one and only son for us(John 3:16). I'm not called to take my friends pains. I also know that I wouldn't be able to take them for am too weak myself. I already complain in my own heart about my pains, I already limp because of pains, I already ditch out on classes because of my own pains but do I even know pain. Christ knew, knows pain because he endured all pains. He endured what I should have, what I know I couldn't. I think of the Waiting song "beautiful blood" "to carry a debt that I never could". Oh praise him, that we don't have to endure such pains and that the pains that we do endure are for his name and that we will never be separated from him (Romans 8)
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Blessed be Your Name
I woke up with this praise song on my lips or at least in my mind, I didn't want to wake up my roommate! "Blessed be Your Name" for me gets me in the mind set, reminds me of all the blessings that he does pour out on to us, most of them I don't notice.
Yesterday was one of those long days that maybe wasn't the best day and so I ended it with a prayer that I believed would come true because his faithful. I prayed that he would give me the strength to get out of bed and have a quiet time before I did anything else(something that has yet to happen this semester). I also prayed that I would not get discouraged today, among other prayers too.
Like every other night I fell asleep normally. I woke up in frustration because when I looked at my clock "6:58" in my head I thought it said "7:58" which meant that I slept through my alarm, missed my quiet time and was going to be really late to work. God instantly showed me that the clock actually said "6:58". I also discovered that I had set my clock not to 7AM but to 7PM, oops! But Praise be to God, who answered my prayer not only to give me strength to get out of bed but also to wake me up and also encourage me to get out because he was faithful. Sometimes one has to be reminded of the characteristics of God, like he is faithful. "Blessed be your name" ran through my head.
But the story doesn't stop there. I got ready to go and left the room only to realize that I didn't have my keys, which meant no breakfast and no way to get to work. Down to the office I went only to realize God blessed me in another way. I'm a desk worker which means I don't have to check out a pass key, which saved time. To my room another blessing I found my keys in an instant, in a place I wouldn't have checked if God hadn't guided me to the spot. I left my room and proceeded to return the keys only to realize I had lost the room key. I always use to wonder how somebody could lose a key between their room and the office. Back and forth down the hall and to my room I went looking every where. But I never stressed thanks be to God especially because I've been getting really stressed out lately. I finally found my key on the ground in the hall.
Not a normal way to start one's day but I'm very thankful that it did start this way. The great thing is that the story is not over because every moment God is blessing us in somehow and so even though this all happened 2 hours ago I have already received more blessings than I can count.
"Blessed be Your name!"
Yesterday was one of those long days that maybe wasn't the best day and so I ended it with a prayer that I believed would come true because his faithful. I prayed that he would give me the strength to get out of bed and have a quiet time before I did anything else(something that has yet to happen this semester). I also prayed that I would not get discouraged today, among other prayers too.
Like every other night I fell asleep normally. I woke up in frustration because when I looked at my clock "6:58" in my head I thought it said "7:58" which meant that I slept through my alarm, missed my quiet time and was going to be really late to work. God instantly showed me that the clock actually said "6:58". I also discovered that I had set my clock not to 7AM but to 7PM, oops! But Praise be to God, who answered my prayer not only to give me strength to get out of bed but also to wake me up and also encourage me to get out because he was faithful. Sometimes one has to be reminded of the characteristics of God, like he is faithful. "Blessed be your name" ran through my head.
But the story doesn't stop there. I got ready to go and left the room only to realize that I didn't have my keys, which meant no breakfast and no way to get to work. Down to the office I went only to realize God blessed me in another way. I'm a desk worker which means I don't have to check out a pass key, which saved time. To my room another blessing I found my keys in an instant, in a place I wouldn't have checked if God hadn't guided me to the spot. I left my room and proceeded to return the keys only to realize I had lost the room key. I always use to wonder how somebody could lose a key between their room and the office. Back and forth down the hall and to my room I went looking every where. But I never stressed thanks be to God especially because I've been getting really stressed out lately. I finally found my key on the ground in the hall.
Not a normal way to start one's day but I'm very thankful that it did start this way. The great thing is that the story is not over because every moment God is blessing us in somehow and so even though this all happened 2 hours ago I have already received more blessings than I can count.
"Blessed be Your name!"
Monday, October 03, 2005
Ladybug companion
Between my ED275 class and Sign Language I enjoy the hour I have to lay in the sun (cause the basement of the ED building gets cold!). Today I finished Joni by Joni Eareckson, a must read. Her story certainly touched my life.
But while sitting in the sun reading the psalms I was blessed with a little ladybug that came and sat on my bracelet. That little blessing is what I needed. Mondays, actually all days of the week, are long and it seems that as soon as I leave Newsom I enter into a world where I am alone. I know God is with me and I know there are believers all around but I remain silent and reserved.
The ladybug was a blessing and in some way it was God's way of encouraging me that moment to go to class, trusting God that every class I take is to glorify him. Today and everyday I live and work for the Lord.
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. - Col 3:23
But while sitting in the sun reading the psalms I was blessed with a little ladybug that came and sat on my bracelet. That little blessing is what I needed. Mondays, actually all days of the week, are long and it seems that as soon as I leave Newsom I enter into a world where I am alone. I know God is with me and I know there are believers all around but I remain silent and reserved.
The ladybug was a blessing and in some way it was God's way of encouraging me that moment to go to class, trusting God that every class I take is to glorify him. Today and everyday I live and work for the Lord.
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. - Col 3:23
Wednesday, September 28, 2005
Cold World
Maybe it was because my bones still ached with cold from my morning walk to class or maybe I was just faced with the truth today. This world is a dark, damp and cold place to live. When it is warm it is only an inlusion that this world isn't as bad as it is. But the clouds will cover the sun and then the truth will be revealed. Hatred all around, jealousy as green as the grass that I lay upon, and standards that the most elite will never achieve. They try to convince you that they approve with their fake smiles and yellow stars covering the truth. Deep down they disapprove and expect so much more, expect perfect. I'm sick of trying to polish my silver for their acceptance ,only to watch them shake their heads because the reflection back is not what they want to see. But I am not them, I am from another world. I stand out like the yellow leaves in the trees. Not the same as the rest but that is fine with me because what they see as weaknesses God sees as strengths. For some one who has MANY weaknesses that makes me want to shout with Joy because I can see why I should boast for the LORD.
"The bows of the warriors are broken, but those who stumbled are armed with strength" - 1 Samuel 2:4
"The ransomed of the LORD will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away. 'I, even I, am he who comforts you. Who are you that you fear mortal men, the sons of men, who are but grass, that you forget the LORD your Maker, who stretched out the heavens and laid the foundations of the earth.'" - Isaiah 51:11-13b
Do you hear, do you see, do you understand if not at least stand in faith with me and others for we are the ones armed with strength, true strength that comes from God. We are on the victorious side. Join brothers and sisters, the LORD is our King!
"The bows of the warriors are broken, but those who stumbled are armed with strength" - 1 Samuel 2:4
"The ransomed of the LORD will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away. 'I, even I, am he who comforts you. Who are you that you fear mortal men, the sons of men, who are but grass, that you forget the LORD your Maker, who stretched out the heavens and laid the foundations of the earth.'" - Isaiah 51:11-13b
Do you hear, do you see, do you understand if not at least stand in faith with me and others for we are the ones armed with strength, true strength that comes from God. We are on the victorious side. Join brothers and sisters, the LORD is our King!
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Walk by faith
for we walk by faith, not by sight. - 1 Cor 5:7
Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him - Col 2:6
"But the life of faith consists in holding within us that which Christ hath put into us, so that Jesus Christ is formed in us the hope of glory. By faith it comes in; by faith it is kept in; faith gives me what I have; keeps what I have; faith makes it mine; faith keeps it mine; faith gets hold of it with one hand, and then clasps it with both hands with a grasp that neither death nor life can loose." CH Spurgeon "Life and Walk of Faith" www.biblebb.com/files/spurgeon/0483.htm (read the sermon yourself)
WE are commanded by God to walk by faith. But what does that mean? I don't fully understand but God has blessed my small search this day. It has been revealed to me that a large part of my semester I have been trying to walk by sight, trusting my feelings. But all my feelings did for me was to send me on a rollercoaster ride with no means of peace and causing me to doubt the many promises given to me. But now looking back to the most joyful times of my walk, when I was walking by faith, when I was trusting completely in him. I try to convince myself that I don't need to smile and that the joy I once had was just a moment of a "spiritual high". Be joyful always - 1 Thes. 5:16 But God commands us to be joyful always. And from a walk of faith comes Joy! This all brings me to a question that was posed by a brother of mine. "How do you exercise your faith?" The answer walk in him.
"Walk implies, first of all, action. Do not let your reception of Christ be a mere thing of thought to you, a subject only for your chamber and your closet, but act upon it all. If you have really received Christ, and are saved, act as if you were saved, with joy, with meekness, with confidence, with faith, with boldness. Walk in him; do not sit down in indolence, but rise and act in him. Walk in him; carry out into practical effect that which you believe." - CH Spurgeon
"We walk by faith, and oh, how sweet
The flowÂ’rs that grow beneath our feet
And fragrance breathe along the way
That leads the soul to endless day.
We walk by faith, but not alone,
Our ShepherdÂ’s tender voice we hear
And feel His hand within our own,
And know that He is always near.
We walk by faith; He wills it so
And marks the path that we should go.
And when, at times, our sky is dim,
He gently draws us close to Him.
We walk by faith divinely blest,
On Him we lean in Him we rest.
The more we trust our ShepherdÂ’s care,
The more His love Â’tis ours to share.
And thus by faith till life shall end
WeÂ’ll walk with Him our dearest Friend.
Till safe we tread the fields of light
Where faith is lost in perfect sight."
- We Walk by Faith, Fanny Crosby (1885)
"Will I believe you when you say
Your hand will guide my every way
Will I receive the words You say
Every moment of every day
Well I will walk by faith
Even when I cannot see
Well because this broken road
Prepares Your will for me
Help me to win my endless fears
You've been so faithful for all my years
With the one breath You make me new
Your grace covers all I do"
- Walk by Faith, Jeremy Camp
Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him - Col 2:6
"But the life of faith consists in holding within us that which Christ hath put into us, so that Jesus Christ is formed in us the hope of glory. By faith it comes in; by faith it is kept in; faith gives me what I have; keeps what I have; faith makes it mine; faith keeps it mine; faith gets hold of it with one hand, and then clasps it with both hands with a grasp that neither death nor life can loose." CH Spurgeon "Life and Walk of Faith" www.biblebb.com/files/spurgeon/0483.htm (read the sermon yourself)
WE are commanded by God to walk by faith. But what does that mean? I don't fully understand but God has blessed my small search this day. It has been revealed to me that a large part of my semester I have been trying to walk by sight, trusting my feelings. But all my feelings did for me was to send me on a rollercoaster ride with no means of peace and causing me to doubt the many promises given to me. But now looking back to the most joyful times of my walk, when I was walking by faith, when I was trusting completely in him. I try to convince myself that I don't need to smile and that the joy I once had was just a moment of a "spiritual high". Be joyful always - 1 Thes. 5:16 But God commands us to be joyful always. And from a walk of faith comes Joy! This all brings me to a question that was posed by a brother of mine. "How do you exercise your faith?" The answer walk in him.
"Walk implies, first of all, action. Do not let your reception of Christ be a mere thing of thought to you, a subject only for your chamber and your closet, but act upon it all. If you have really received Christ, and are saved, act as if you were saved, with joy, with meekness, with confidence, with faith, with boldness. Walk in him; do not sit down in indolence, but rise and act in him. Walk in him; carry out into practical effect that which you believe." - CH Spurgeon
"We walk by faith, and oh, how sweet
The flowÂ’rs that grow beneath our feet
And fragrance breathe along the way
That leads the soul to endless day.
We walk by faith, but not alone,
Our ShepherdÂ’s tender voice we hear
And feel His hand within our own,
And know that He is always near.
We walk by faith; He wills it so
And marks the path that we should go.
And when, at times, our sky is dim,
He gently draws us close to Him.
We walk by faith divinely blest,
On Him we lean in Him we rest.
The more we trust our ShepherdÂ’s care,
The more His love Â’tis ours to share.
And thus by faith till life shall end
WeÂ’ll walk with Him our dearest Friend.
Till safe we tread the fields of light
Where faith is lost in perfect sight."
- We Walk by Faith, Fanny Crosby (1885)
"Will I believe you when you say
Your hand will guide my every way
Will I receive the words You say
Every moment of every day
Well I will walk by faith
Even when I cannot see
Well because this broken road
Prepares Your will for me
Help me to win my endless fears
You've been so faithful for all my years
With the one breath You make me new
Your grace covers all I do"
- Walk by Faith, Jeremy Camp
Friday, September 23, 2005
Love your neighbor as yourself
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." Matthew 22:36-40
commandment - An authoritative indication to be obeyed
It doesn't just merely suggest we follow these two things; God COMMANDS us to. But yet we hold back from fully doing so, from fully completely 2 commandments. Why is it so hard to follow these edicts? I don't know.
I was caught by the second one the most today. During breakfast and my first class it was all I could think about. "Love your neighbor as yourself" The question comes to mind, how do I love myself?
~ Before making any decisions I think how I profit
~ During all situations I consider myself first
~ before doing anything I consider the pros/cons for myself
~ During the day I think about myself
~ when I read a bible verse I contemplate what it has to do with me
~ I try to surround myself with only people I like
~ If I get bored of a conversation I leave
~ I go to things only if I want to
~ I get frustrated when others aren't on time with my schedule, I think my time is more valuable than anybody else
~ I try to fix myself before helping others
~ I want people to listen to me when I have something to say but won't listen to others when they have something to say
~ I want people to care about my passions but I don't care about others'
I could go on but I would just become more disgusted with myself and I would never get around to a solution. The list above aren't all bad but where your heart that is where the problems occur. When you go about the day is your heart on yourself or on the people God wants your heart to me on. I'm no scholar or even a great mind. But I do desire to follow God's commandments. I can't grasp the solution without God so from here I will just pray. A prayer for you and me, a prayer that God will guide us on how to love one another as ourselves, a prayer to left the veil from our eyes, a prayer to continue to recognize our imperfect selves and a prayer to be filled with the spirit at all times.
God Bless my brothers and sisters
Happy Birthday Eddie and Jen
commandment - An authoritative indication to be obeyed
It doesn't just merely suggest we follow these two things; God COMMANDS us to. But yet we hold back from fully doing so, from fully completely 2 commandments. Why is it so hard to follow these edicts? I don't know.
I was caught by the second one the most today. During breakfast and my first class it was all I could think about. "Love your neighbor as yourself" The question comes to mind, how do I love myself?
~ Before making any decisions I think how I profit
~ During all situations I consider myself first
~ before doing anything I consider the pros/cons for myself
~ During the day I think about myself
~ when I read a bible verse I contemplate what it has to do with me
~ I try to surround myself with only people I like
~ If I get bored of a conversation I leave
~ I go to things only if I want to
~ I get frustrated when others aren't on time with my schedule, I think my time is more valuable than anybody else
~ I try to fix myself before helping others
~ I want people to listen to me when I have something to say but won't listen to others when they have something to say
~ I want people to care about my passions but I don't care about others'
I could go on but I would just become more disgusted with myself and I would never get around to a solution. The list above aren't all bad but where your heart that is where the problems occur. When you go about the day is your heart on yourself or on the people God wants your heart to me on. I'm no scholar or even a great mind. But I do desire to follow God's commandments. I can't grasp the solution without God so from here I will just pray. A prayer for you and me, a prayer that God will guide us on how to love one another as ourselves, a prayer to left the veil from our eyes, a prayer to continue to recognize our imperfect selves and a prayer to be filled with the spirit at all times.
God Bless my brothers and sisters
Happy Birthday Eddie and Jen
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Sharing Good News!
You know that rumble in your stomach that you get when God is calling you to do something. A rumble that only comes from your flesh fighting back because if you look at the situation it doesn't make sense to get nervous. I mean you're only going to ask somebody a question, your only going to share with somebody something that causes you to get excited. Why do we get so nervous, because your flesh does not want you to do this. If you pray for courage, God will be faithful. You don't know the reason for your "mission" at the time. When God wants to do something amazing with you, that's when your flesh fights the hardest, at least that's my experience. Lets all prayer for courage to complete what Matthew 28:19 says: "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit"
Monday, September 19, 2005
Give and Take Away! Thankful either way!
An excerpt from my journal this morning after listening to a speech about how one of my classmates lost her best friend in high school
Maybe just a moving story, but there is a reason that things inside you turn, something about this story touches a part of you. Not quite to tears but that turn of your stomach is there along with a small twitch of the heart. Move on without a small dose of reflection would be a mistake. Sitting here on a cold slab of concrete with the world passing me by all that runs through my mind. 'What would it feel like to lose your best friend?' How much do I appreciate those relationships that surround me. I've never had a best friend but I do have many that are always there to catch a tear, give a warm embrace when I feel so cold, share my joy with and worship together. Where would I be without fellowship? I think of the thoughts I had last night, thinking that my presense isn't worth much but it is, just like the presense of every soul around me is worth so much. To lose one would be a tragedy but do I show this, do I love those around me with all of my heart? Do they feel my embrace outside and inside? Will I recognize their worth once they are gone or will I see it now? Cherish every relationship, every moment for the blessing it is. Will these just be empty words on a page or are these things written on my heart? Our time here is fleeting and so are the relationships that overwhelm me now. Each one a blessing that I don't deserve and without I might lose all hope.
I just want all to know I love you so much and if I could give electronic hugs(that's werid!) I would!
Maybe just a moving story, but there is a reason that things inside you turn, something about this story touches a part of you. Not quite to tears but that turn of your stomach is there along with a small twitch of the heart. Move on without a small dose of reflection would be a mistake. Sitting here on a cold slab of concrete with the world passing me by all that runs through my mind. 'What would it feel like to lose your best friend?' How much do I appreciate those relationships that surround me. I've never had a best friend but I do have many that are always there to catch a tear, give a warm embrace when I feel so cold, share my joy with and worship together. Where would I be without fellowship? I think of the thoughts I had last night, thinking that my presense isn't worth much but it is, just like the presense of every soul around me is worth so much. To lose one would be a tragedy but do I show this, do I love those around me with all of my heart? Do they feel my embrace outside and inside? Will I recognize their worth once they are gone or will I see it now? Cherish every relationship, every moment for the blessing it is. Will these just be empty words on a page or are these things written on my heart? Our time here is fleeting and so are the relationships that overwhelm me now. Each one a blessing that I don't deserve and without I might lose all hope.
I just want all to know I love you so much and if I could give electronic hugs(that's werid!) I would!
Sunday, September 18, 2005
Repeat that!
I must confess, I complain when I don't learn something new during my quiet times. But something Mitch said today was that we don't have consistent quiet times so that we can hear something new but rather that we can hear what we have already heard over and over again. Repeating the truths to us that we have yet to fully understand. "The loudest voice wins" I want that voice to be God and not this world with it's repeated slogans. We come to God consistently so that his truth is what repeats in our head during the day, when we have to make a decision.
"The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God...For God, who said, 'Let light shine out of darkness,' made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." - 2 Cor.4:4&6
"The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God...For God, who said, 'Let light shine out of darkness,' made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." - 2 Cor.4:4&6
Friday, September 16, 2005
Should we spend less time praying for what causes us to cry and instead spend more time praying for what causes God to cry?
This convecting question was suggested to me a couple nights ago and it has been on my mind and heart since.
I spend so much time praying for myself, for the things I want, praying for me to be fixed. But something that was said to me in Iowa comes to mind and that is that we have so many broken pieces that we can't focus on fixing all of them before we can help others, before we can do God's work because then we will never get to his work. We have to be fixing while we are serving and loving.
Join in with me in prayer for the lost today, the many lost souls that pass us everyday, that sit by us in class, that eat in the same dining center, that live in our dorms. Pray for the many christians that pass by these lost, pray that all the christians of this school be filled with the spirit and that we all live God focused lives.
This convecting question was suggested to me a couple nights ago and it has been on my mind and heart since.
I spend so much time praying for myself, for the things I want, praying for me to be fixed. But something that was said to me in Iowa comes to mind and that is that we have so many broken pieces that we can't focus on fixing all of them before we can help others, before we can do God's work because then we will never get to his work. We have to be fixing while we are serving and loving.
Join in with me in prayer for the lost today, the many lost souls that pass us everyday, that sit by us in class, that eat in the same dining center, that live in our dorms. Pray for the many christians that pass by these lost, pray that all the christians of this school be filled with the spirit and that we all live God focused lives.
Thursday, September 15, 2005
Rely on his strength
I love Wednesday nights. Some of us from my d-team go to the church to baby-sit while the parents meet. I don't like the hysteria and lack of authority we have. But I do love the faith these kids have and I do love the simple message Eddie gives. Last night it was about Romans 3:23 "For all have fallen short of the glory of God". To demonstrate he had one of the kids stand a chair and try to jump onto a chair that was all the way across the room. She made it about half way, because that is what it means to fall short. Then he demonstrated how Jesus helps us across to the side with God. The kids helplessly dangled from his shoulders, relying completely on him.
Some simple message for kids? No this is the truth and that is why it hits me deep. I’ve tried many times to jump the gap myself but instead just fall flat on my face. I’ve tried fighting Jesus to do it at least a little on my own. But he wants us to rely completely on him, so aware of our inadequacy that we give up trying our own way. ‘I surrender’
Some simple message for kids? No this is the truth and that is why it hits me deep. I’ve tried many times to jump the gap myself but instead just fall flat on my face. I’ve tried fighting Jesus to do it at least a little on my own. But he wants us to rely completely on him, so aware of our inadequacy that we give up trying our own way. ‘I surrender’
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
A Plea for Mercy
Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."
The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.
It is good for a man to bear the yoke
while he is young.
Let him sit alone in silence,
for the LORD has laid it on him.
Let him bury his face in the dust—
there may yet be hope.
Let him offer his cheek to one who would strike him,
and let him be filled with disgrace.
For men are not cast off
by the Lord forever.
Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,
so great is his unfailing love.
For he does not willingly bring affliction
or grief to the children of men.
- Lamentations 3:22-33
But read on:
Is it not from the mouth of the Most High
that both calamities and good things come?
Why should any living man complain
when punished for his sins?
Let us examine our ways and test them,
and let us return to the LORD.
- Lamentations 3:38-40
Joy is gone from our hearts;
our dancing has turned to mourning.
The crown has fallen from our head.
Woe to us, for we have sinned!
Because of this our hearts are faint,
because of these things our eyes grow dim
- Lamentations 5:15-17
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."
The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.
It is good for a man to bear the yoke
while he is young.
Let him sit alone in silence,
for the LORD has laid it on him.
Let him bury his face in the dust—
there may yet be hope.
Let him offer his cheek to one who would strike him,
and let him be filled with disgrace.
For men are not cast off
by the Lord forever.
Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,
so great is his unfailing love.
For he does not willingly bring affliction
or grief to the children of men.
- Lamentations 3:22-33
But read on:
Is it not from the mouth of the Most High
that both calamities and good things come?
Why should any living man complain
when punished for his sins?
Let us examine our ways and test them,
and let us return to the LORD.
- Lamentations 3:38-40
Joy is gone from our hearts;
our dancing has turned to mourning.
The crown has fallen from our head.
Woe to us, for we have sinned!
Because of this our hearts are faint,
because of these things our eyes grow dim
- Lamentations 5:15-17
Oh I pray, Joy return to my soul
"Joy is unrelated to happiness. It comes from a source beyond time and circumstances and resides in the person and personality of Christ. It is most evident in our powerlessness. It appears when we don't expect it. Joy can endure through the worst adversity but can evaporate with the merest moment of self-reflection." CS Lewis
I find myself questioning that phrase I wrote on Joy's tank, "I will always have joy" Right now my soul seems to me in a dark cave, I once saw light but now I'm just wandering through the dark hoping that a light will flicker on or this cave will turn into just a tunnel but it's hard to see where I'm going without some source of light. I experienced joy at one point today but like fireflies it died away. Your words that once quaked my soul and caused me to scream from the mountain tops now have little affect on me. I read and read but it just causes me to hunger for joy and the fruits of the Spirit more and more. I guess that's a sort of quake but not the same quake that caused me to tell people of your love and caused me to spend hours praying for the lost. Instead all I desire is to be filled with your Spirit and feel your comforting arms around me. Can't I just come home!
I find myself questioning that phrase I wrote on Joy's tank, "I will always have joy" Right now my soul seems to me in a dark cave, I once saw light but now I'm just wandering through the dark hoping that a light will flicker on or this cave will turn into just a tunnel but it's hard to see where I'm going without some source of light. I experienced joy at one point today but like fireflies it died away. Your words that once quaked my soul and caused me to scream from the mountain tops now have little affect on me. I read and read but it just causes me to hunger for joy and the fruits of the Spirit more and more. I guess that's a sort of quake but not the same quake that caused me to tell people of your love and caused me to spend hours praying for the lost. Instead all I desire is to be filled with your Spirit and feel your comforting arms around me. Can't I just come home!
How are You?
If you know me you know that this question causes me much unecessary grief. I don't want to lie but yet it seems I never know the answer. It bugs me, Especially these last couple weeks but that is probably because I've been so short with people. Again today I find myself unable to answer this simple daily question. If you didn't know I spend much of my day plaguing over this question because I can't return to the dorms without an answer because I feel unapproved. Unneccessary stress!
Today I really desire to know, maybe it's my emotions or something but I find myself unable to pin point where I am. It's not so much where I am emotional, it's the where am I spiritual. Maybe I'm not meant to be able to answer this question. Just have faith that all is well? I want to say joy and I'm sure I experienced at least an ounce, at least that minute to class watching the sun rays break through the clouds. But yet I'm also sure that the hour in class my heart was burdened and joy was not there, just an ache. Often I find myself in a state of complete emptiness.
Maybe I'm learning what it means to constantly pray, constantly pray that God fills me with the Spirit. Not just a prayer in the morning but every minute here I need to remind myself of who my king is, remind myself why I'm here, remind myself to love others as he loves me. One verse "pray continually" - 1 Thess. 5:17 I've never looked at it seperately. But it is just one verse, one concept that I'm seeking understanding in and we all should.
Today I really desire to know, maybe it's my emotions or something but I find myself unable to pin point where I am. It's not so much where I am emotional, it's the where am I spiritual. Maybe I'm not meant to be able to answer this question. Just have faith that all is well? I want to say joy and I'm sure I experienced at least an ounce, at least that minute to class watching the sun rays break through the clouds. But yet I'm also sure that the hour in class my heart was burdened and joy was not there, just an ache. Often I find myself in a state of complete emptiness.
Maybe I'm learning what it means to constantly pray, constantly pray that God fills me with the Spirit. Not just a prayer in the morning but every minute here I need to remind myself of who my king is, remind myself why I'm here, remind myself to love others as he loves me. One verse "pray continually" - 1 Thess. 5:17 I've never looked at it seperately. But it is just one verse, one concept that I'm seeking understanding in and we all should.
Moon Set!!!
Lying in an empty room trying to read in order to distract from my overwhelming homesickness that I've never felt before to this degree. Home sickness for my family, my neighbor girls and ever one I known in Boise. Deep sleep soon found me only to end when I awoke in the high rise couch of room 177 listening to the faint rustle of the wind and the once in while bone chilling screams of Liz receiving peroxide for her injury.
I wandered out in a half sleep matter only to find myself captivated by the moon I saw from the second floor landing. I left my stuff and found myself walking. Once to the parking lot I stopped and listened to the chirping of the crickets and the zoom of the passing cars. The stars where not visible because the over powering light of the street lights dimmed them away. But the moon couldn't be dimmed by any man made light.
My feelings of homesickness transformed into a deeper even more intense homesickness for my real home in heaven. I don't belong in this world but I must stay until God says I'm done. I'm sick of the pain and the meaninglessness of the things around me. The distracting worldly things that cause me to stumble. My wretched self that is so hard to train to be pure. Following you is so hard I just want to rest in you without distractions. Sing songs of praise forever what could be more glorious.
I looked at the moon and just desired to be home but I'm here for a reason. Sitting by a tree with my sister Chelsea we watched something I've never seen the moon set, but it is only 12:30 where is it going? Back to reality, back down to this world where I'm struggling to be guided by the Spirit to even be in the Spirit. The days are so long when joy isn't filling your heart.
Now I'm sitting here in my silent room except for the white noise machine and those annoying cars that pass by so late. Sleep soon. I hope I will find myself waking up in heaven but really I'll probably wake up in this world again.
Thank you for the moon. I pray that tomorrow you will fill me with the Spirit, please!
"Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." - Lam. 3:22-24
"This is the day the LORD has made let us rejoice and be glad in it" - Psalm 118:24
I wandered out in a half sleep matter only to find myself captivated by the moon I saw from the second floor landing. I left my stuff and found myself walking. Once to the parking lot I stopped and listened to the chirping of the crickets and the zoom of the passing cars. The stars where not visible because the over powering light of the street lights dimmed them away. But the moon couldn't be dimmed by any man made light.
My feelings of homesickness transformed into a deeper even more intense homesickness for my real home in heaven. I don't belong in this world but I must stay until God says I'm done. I'm sick of the pain and the meaninglessness of the things around me. The distracting worldly things that cause me to stumble. My wretched self that is so hard to train to be pure. Following you is so hard I just want to rest in you without distractions. Sing songs of praise forever what could be more glorious.
I looked at the moon and just desired to be home but I'm here for a reason. Sitting by a tree with my sister Chelsea we watched something I've never seen the moon set, but it is only 12:30 where is it going? Back to reality, back down to this world where I'm struggling to be guided by the Spirit to even be in the Spirit. The days are so long when joy isn't filling your heart.
Now I'm sitting here in my silent room except for the white noise machine and those annoying cars that pass by so late. Sleep soon. I hope I will find myself waking up in heaven but really I'll probably wake up in this world again.
Thank you for the moon. I pray that tomorrow you will fill me with the Spirit, please!
"Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." - Lam. 3:22-24
"This is the day the LORD has made let us rejoice and be glad in it" - Psalm 118:24
Monday, September 12, 2005
What would make your life better?
This question was posed in my education class. A simple "cleaner room" was my response but really I sat there pondering the question much longer.
What would make my life better?
For the past week I have not been in the Spirit. I know the Spirit is within me but I've not been experiencing the fruits of the Spirit. So my answer would be to be filled with the Spirit. To have patience with people, to love people, to have joy, to not be easily tempered. I pray for these things but yet for some unknown reason I find myself in some dark hole. God has a reason for this time in my life. Maybe I'll become more humble, recognize how much I need the Spirit. Endurance with my faith? Whatever may come of this time I only desire that God be glorified.
So what would make your life better?
What would make my life better?
For the past week I have not been in the Spirit. I know the Spirit is within me but I've not been experiencing the fruits of the Spirit. So my answer would be to be filled with the Spirit. To have patience with people, to love people, to have joy, to not be easily tempered. I pray for these things but yet for some unknown reason I find myself in some dark hole. God has a reason for this time in my life. Maybe I'll become more humble, recognize how much I need the Spirit. Endurance with my faith? Whatever may come of this time I only desire that God be glorified.
So what would make your life better?
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
Waiting
We are all waiting for something
Or maybe some one
I watch your gaze as you look
Look for that something
Look for that one
Not this
Not me
Something else
Some one else
We are all looking
But when will we find
That something
That some one
When will our eyes stop
When will our search end
Or maybe we have already found
Or have been found
Just blind to see
The mystery of the unseen
Or maybe some one
I watch your gaze as you look
Look for that something
Look for that one
Not this
Not me
Something else
Some one else
We are all looking
But when will we find
That something
That some one
When will our eyes stop
When will our search end
Or maybe we have already found
Or have been found
Just blind to see
The mystery of the unseen
Secret Sorrow
A Poem I found that are the words from my heart
I have a secret sorrow,
A grief deep down inside,
Where large and heavy burdens,
In tiny places hide.
There are no doors nor windows
To meet another's eye,
For no one understands it,
Except my Lord and I.
The times of bitter anguish,
With Him alone I spend,
For in this place of suffering,
He is my only Friend.
I have a secret sorrow,
A grief deep down inside,
Where large and heavy burdens,
In tiny places hide.
There are no doors nor windows
To meet another's eye,
For no one understands it,
Except my Lord and I.
The times of bitter anguish,
With Him alone I spend,
For in this place of suffering,
He is my only Friend.
Psalm 103
Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits-
who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
The LORD works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.
He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:
The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.
He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
As for man, his days are like grass,he flourishes like a flower of the field;
the wind blows over it and it is gone,and its place remembers it no more.
But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.
The LORD has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.
Praise the LORD, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word.
Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,you his servants who do his will.
Praise the LORD, all his works everywhere in his dominion.
Prise the LORD, O my soul.
Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits-
who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
The LORD works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.
He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:
The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.
He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.
For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
As for man, his days are like grass,he flourishes like a flower of the field;
the wind blows over it and it is gone,and its place remembers it no more.
But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.
The LORD has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.
Praise the LORD, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word.
Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,you his servants who do his will.
Praise the LORD, all his works everywhere in his dominion.
Prise the LORD, O my soul.
The Storm
Nothing can seperate me from my God
Clouds may pass between me and him
They may even stay for some time, but God gives me perseverance
May the Lord direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance.
- 2 Thess. 3:5
They may even start to rain on me, but God gives me comfort in his love
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort - 2 Cor. 1:3
The winds might even try to push me off the path, But you guide me
Teach me your way, O LORD; lead me in a straight path because of my oppressors. - Psalm 27:11
The fog might try to blind me, but I look to you
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. - 2 Cor. 4:18
Clouds may pass between me and him
They may even stay for some time, but God gives me perseverance
May the Lord direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance.
- 2 Thess. 3:5
They may even start to rain on me, but God gives me comfort in his love
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort - 2 Cor. 1:3
The winds might even try to push me off the path, But you guide me
Teach me your way, O LORD; lead me in a straight path because of my oppressors. - Psalm 27:11
The fog might try to blind me, but I look to you
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. - 2 Cor. 4:18
Sunday, September 04, 2005
The song speaks
"Out Of Control"
Hoobastank
I've done everything as you say
I've followed your rules without question
I thought it would help me see things clearly
But instead of helping me to see
I look around and it's like I'm blinded
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Cause I don't know
If I can trust you
I don't understand what you want from me
I feel like I'm spinning out of control
Try to focus but everything's twisted
And all along I thought you would be there
(Thought you would be there)
To let me know I'm not alone
But in fact that's exactly what I was
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Cause I don't know
If I can trust you
All of the things you've said to me
I may never know the answer
To this endless mystery
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Is it a mystery?
Is it a mystery?
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control...
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Cause I don't know
If I can trust you
All the things you've said to me
And I may never know the answer
To this endless mystery
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
Hoobastank
I've done everything as you say
I've followed your rules without question
I thought it would help me see things clearly
But instead of helping me to see
I look around and it's like I'm blinded
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Cause I don't know
If I can trust you
I don't understand what you want from me
I feel like I'm spinning out of control
Try to focus but everything's twisted
And all along I thought you would be there
(Thought you would be there)
To let me know I'm not alone
But in fact that's exactly what I was
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Cause I don't know
If I can trust you
All of the things you've said to me
I may never know the answer
To this endless mystery
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Is it a mystery?
Is it a mystery?
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control...
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
Cause I don't know
If I can trust you
All the things you've said to me
And I may never know the answer
To this endless mystery
Where should I go?
What should I do?
I don't understand what you want from me
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
I'm spinning out of control
Out of control
Friday, September 02, 2005
God or Money?
I'm lead to write another entry, not really sure why
But today I came to work and found a wallet hidden by the keyboard. THe owner came by shortly later and I returned it to her. But unfortunatelly $200 was missing, I could do nothing but see the disappointment in her eyes. Minutes later the one who hid it asked me if it was returned, I said yes and she thanked him with a smile.
I thought of the lesson Eddie gave to te kids on Wednesday night. He mentioned that we can't both serve money and God. He also addressed an event that occured earlier that evening when one of the kids stole another kid's quarter. Eddie told them that as we get older it becomes harder to chose God over money and soon your friend will be caring more than a quarter. This girl lost $200, probably stolen by who knows who.
Who do you serve? God or money
But today I came to work and found a wallet hidden by the keyboard. THe owner came by shortly later and I returned it to her. But unfortunatelly $200 was missing, I could do nothing but see the disappointment in her eyes. Minutes later the one who hid it asked me if it was returned, I said yes and she thanked him with a smile.
I thought of the lesson Eddie gave to te kids on Wednesday night. He mentioned that we can't both serve money and God. He also addressed an event that occured earlier that evening when one of the kids stole another kid's quarter. Eddie told them that as we get older it becomes harder to chose God over money and soon your friend will be caring more than a quarter. This girl lost $200, probably stolen by who knows who.
Who do you serve? God or money
No rewards come from quitting
All of my life I took pride in the fact that I would never quit. I played even though I was the worse player. Sophmore year of high school I made it on the basketball team but rarely played, one game I only played for 30 secs. But I still went to practice everyday. Volleyball I didn't even make the team but instead I became the manager and again went to every practice. The same story with track I was last but I came to practice everyday. I took pride that I would never quit.
But what does this have to do with anything? Well because I didn't quit amazing things happen, rewards that wouldn't have happened if I did as the world was telling me, "Quit". Basketball I met my future history teacher that was an encouragement for me my senior year to go to CSU, Volleyball I met a coach and math teacher that I now look up to as a role model for my future career as a math teacher/coach, and track led me to a passion that rewarded me in a worldly way but more importantly it is now a passion that God is guiding me in.
What if I had quit my sophmore year where would I be today? At CSU probably not, a math major probably not, following God?
This blog was inspired by watching "Rudy" a movie that makes you want to dream more and to never quit.
I ask you to join with me in dreaming, dreaming big, beyond what we could imagine because God is beyond this world. Even when the world around us tells us to quit we pick up our crosses everyday with joy, joy for our King.
But what does this have to do with anything? Well because I didn't quit amazing things happen, rewards that wouldn't have happened if I did as the world was telling me, "Quit". Basketball I met my future history teacher that was an encouragement for me my senior year to go to CSU, Volleyball I met a coach and math teacher that I now look up to as a role model for my future career as a math teacher/coach, and track led me to a passion that rewarded me in a worldly way but more importantly it is now a passion that God is guiding me in.
What if I had quit my sophmore year where would I be today? At CSU probably not, a math major probably not, following God?
This blog was inspired by watching "Rudy" a movie that makes you want to dream more and to never quit.
I ask you to join with me in dreaming, dreaming big, beyond what we could imagine because God is beyond this world. Even when the world around us tells us to quit we pick up our crosses everyday with joy, joy for our King.
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
What Lead to my tears
A poem about sufferings:
I tryed to put my thoughts to words
But I failed, not only myself
But the standards set by this world
Why would this world cause tears?
It doesn't, you do
One not of this world
My pride? maybe
Your flesh? possible
Or my foolishness?
I beat myself for sufferings
Where joy should be found
Only tears in my pillow
Forgive him for his mistakes
Look to the only comforter
And Reflect on the Truths
Now I'm on my knees
Tears for my Holy One
Forgiveness for my own sins
What lead to my tears
"light and momentary troubles" will pass
"He will wipe every tear from their eyes, There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain" - Rev. 21:4
I tryed to put my thoughts to words
But I failed, not only myself
But the standards set by this world
Why would this world cause tears?
It doesn't, you do
One not of this world
My pride? maybe
Your flesh? possible
Or my foolishness?
I beat myself for sufferings
Where joy should be found
Only tears in my pillow
Forgive him for his mistakes
Look to the only comforter
And Reflect on the Truths
Now I'm on my knees
Tears for my Holy One
Forgiveness for my own sins
What lead to my tears
"light and momentary troubles" will pass
"He will wipe every tear from their eyes, There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain" - Rev. 21:4
Monday, August 29, 2005
Hallelujah
Words that come to mind when I think of God
Selah
( Hebrew: סלה) meaning "pause, reflection", within the context of a prayer or psalms, is similar in purpose to Amen in that it stresses the importance of the preceding passage.
In this way, Selah is thought to infer that one should pause and reflect on what has been said.
Amen
-a declaration of affirmation found in the Hebrew Bible
Praise
- Expression of approval, commendation, or admiration.
- The extolling or exaltation of a deity, ruler, or hero.
Glory
-Great honor, praise, or distinction accorded by common consent; renown.
-Something conferring honor or renown.
-A highly praiseworthy asset: Your wit is your crowning glory.
-Adoration, praise, and thanksgiving offered in worship.
-Majestic beauty and splendor; resplendence: The sun set in a blaze of glory.
-The splendor and bliss of heaven; perfect happiness.
Majesty
-The greatness and dignity of a sovereign.
-The sovereignty and power of God.
-Supreme authority or power: the majesty of the law.
Honor
-High respect, as that shown for special merit;
-Good name; reputation.
-A source or cause of credit: was an honor to the profession.
-Glory or recognition; distinction.
-High rank.
Faithful
-Adhering firmly and devotedly, as to a person, cause, or idea; loyal.
-Having or full of faith.
-Worthy of trust or belief; reliable.
-Consistent with truth or actuality
Awesome
-Inspiring awe
Holy
-Belonging to, derived from, or associated with a divine power; sacred.
-Regarded with or worthy of worship or veneration; revered: a holy book.
-Regarded as deserving special respect or reverence: The pursuit of peace is our holiest quest.
Sacred
-Dedicated to or set apart for the worship of a deity.
-Worthy of religious veneration: the sacred teachings of the Buddha.
-Made or declared holy: sacred bread and wine.
-Worthy of respect; venerable.
Reverence
-A feeling of profound awe and respect and often love; veneration.
-An act showing respect, especially a bow or curtsy.
Venerate
-To regard with respect, reverence, or heartfelt deference
Perfect
-Lacking nothing essential to the whole; complete of its nature or kind.
-Being without defect or blemish: a perfect specimen.
-Thoroughly skilled or talented in a certain field or area; proficient.
-Pure
Good
-Being positive or desirable in nature; not bad or poor
-Having the qualities that are desirable or distinguishing
-Serving the desired purpose or end; suitable
-Not spoiled or ruined: The milk is still good.
-Superior to the average
-Of high quality: good books.
-Worthy of respect; honorable
-Attractive; handsome: good looks.
-Beneficial to health
-Competent; skilled
-Complete; thorough
-Reliable; sure
-Valid or true
-Genuine; real
-Ample; substantial: a good income.
-Of moral excellence; upright: a good person.
-Benevolent; kind: a good soul; a good heart.
-Loyal
-Well-behaved; obedient: a good child.
-Socially correct; proper: good manners.
All these words are great but they are words of this world. How can you describe something that is above, bigger, greater, beyond, more awesome than this world. When God works in your life how do you explain to those around you, you can't and shouldn't try because if he wants them to know/understand he will reveal to them, until then, praise him
"But it's when you hold me
That I start unfolding
And all I can say is
Hallelujah, hallelujah" - Bethany Dillon
Hallelujah
-Used to express praise or joy.
-"Praise the Lord"
Selah
( Hebrew: סלה) meaning "pause, reflection", within the context of a prayer or psalms, is similar in purpose to Amen in that it stresses the importance of the preceding passage.
In this way, Selah is thought to infer that one should pause and reflect on what has been said.
Amen
-a declaration of affirmation found in the Hebrew Bible
Praise
- Expression of approval, commendation, or admiration.
- The extolling or exaltation of a deity, ruler, or hero.
Glory
-Great honor, praise, or distinction accorded by common consent; renown.
-Something conferring honor or renown.
-A highly praiseworthy asset: Your wit is your crowning glory.
-Adoration, praise, and thanksgiving offered in worship.
-Majestic beauty and splendor; resplendence: The sun set in a blaze of glory.
-The splendor and bliss of heaven; perfect happiness.
Majesty
-The greatness and dignity of a sovereign.
-The sovereignty and power of God.
-Supreme authority or power: the majesty of the law.
Honor
-High respect, as that shown for special merit;
-Good name; reputation.
-A source or cause of credit: was an honor to the profession.
-Glory or recognition; distinction.
-High rank.
Faithful
-Adhering firmly and devotedly, as to a person, cause, or idea; loyal.
-Having or full of faith.
-Worthy of trust or belief; reliable.
-Consistent with truth or actuality
Awesome
-Inspiring awe
Holy
-Belonging to, derived from, or associated with a divine power; sacred.
-Regarded with or worthy of worship or veneration; revered: a holy book.
-Regarded as deserving special respect or reverence: The pursuit of peace is our holiest quest.
Sacred
-Dedicated to or set apart for the worship of a deity.
-Worthy of religious veneration: the sacred teachings of the Buddha.
-Made or declared holy: sacred bread and wine.
-Worthy of respect; venerable.
Reverence
-A feeling of profound awe and respect and often love; veneration.
-An act showing respect, especially a bow or curtsy.
Venerate
-To regard with respect, reverence, or heartfelt deference
Perfect
-Lacking nothing essential to the whole; complete of its nature or kind.
-Being without defect or blemish: a perfect specimen.
-Thoroughly skilled or talented in a certain field or area; proficient.
-Pure
Good
-Being positive or desirable in nature; not bad or poor
-Having the qualities that are desirable or distinguishing
-Serving the desired purpose or end; suitable
-Not spoiled or ruined: The milk is still good.
-Superior to the average
-Of high quality: good books.
-Worthy of respect; honorable
-Attractive; handsome: good looks.
-Beneficial to health
-Competent; skilled
-Complete; thorough
-Reliable; sure
-Valid or true
-Genuine; real
-Ample; substantial: a good income.
-Of moral excellence; upright: a good person.
-Benevolent; kind: a good soul; a good heart.
-Loyal
-Well-behaved; obedient: a good child.
-Socially correct; proper: good manners.
All these words are great but they are words of this world. How can you describe something that is above, bigger, greater, beyond, more awesome than this world. When God works in your life how do you explain to those around you, you can't and shouldn't try because if he wants them to know/understand he will reveal to them, until then, praise him
"But it's when you hold me
That I start unfolding
And all I can say is
Hallelujah, hallelujah" - Bethany Dillon
Hallelujah
-Used to express praise or joy.
-"Praise the Lord"
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Wake UP
"No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard! Be alert[f]! You do not know when that time will come. It's like a man going away: He leaves his house and puts his servants in charge, each with his assigned task, and tells the one at the door to keep watch.
"Therefore keep watch because you do not know when the owner of the house will come back—whether in the evening, or at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or at dawn. If he comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping. What I say to you, I say to everyone: 'Watch!' " - Mark 13:32-37
Jesus has given us our jobs/tasks to be completed, don't be caught not doing so. Have any of you worked for somebody and when your doing something that doesn't follow the rules (even if it is just for a moment) you are on extra watch that they don't see you? You don't want to get caught. You know you are doing wrong because your conscience tells you so.
In Christ we have the spirit to tell us when we aren't doing what he wants us to do. We are working for the Lord. You don't want him to catch you not working, right?
Stop and pray and ask yourself if you are working for the Lord. Are you doing what you think he wants you to do or what he wants you to do? Examine who you are working for, somebody else or God?
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, - Matthew 28:19
"Therefore keep watch because you do not know when the owner of the house will come back—whether in the evening, or at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or at dawn. If he comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping. What I say to you, I say to everyone: 'Watch!' " - Mark 13:32-37
Jesus has given us our jobs/tasks to be completed, don't be caught not doing so. Have any of you worked for somebody and when your doing something that doesn't follow the rules (even if it is just for a moment) you are on extra watch that they don't see you? You don't want to get caught. You know you are doing wrong because your conscience tells you so.
In Christ we have the spirit to tell us when we aren't doing what he wants us to do. We are working for the Lord. You don't want him to catch you not working, right?
Stop and pray and ask yourself if you are working for the Lord. Are you doing what you think he wants you to do or what he wants you to do? Examine who you are working for, somebody else or God?
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, - Matthew 28:19
Saturday, August 20, 2005
My Story _ Testimony
God made every human being on this earth and he has a purpose for every single one. He is constantly working in our lives. We are all a piece of art, we all have a story. So what is my story?
Well I grew up in a household that didn't go to church and we didn't even talk about such things. High school I was dedicated to running and school and nothing else. I had little friends and planned to make new ones in college. I planned to start a new life because the life I was currently living wasn't satisfying.
I went to CSU for their chemical engineering program and to run for them too, because I thought that was the only way I would continue to run, when in fact Colorado is one of the most active states. I flew out by myself and had my stuff shipped later. Some would say that it would be scary to be alone in a new place. For me I have always been okay with being alone.
Entering college I had dreams of making friends, doing well in school, maybe find a boyfriend, and find happiness and purpose in my life. Who would have guessed that God had a bigger/better plan for me.
I instantly clicked with my roomate and within the first week of college she invited me to a number of barbeques through different church organizations. I felt bad because I wasn't Christian and yet I was eatting their food. I considered church groups like clubs and so to me being christian was just a title for members of the church. I wasn't part of the "club", so am I allowed to eat their food?
Another important character that God put in my path was a girl who lived next door to me, Sarah. A sophmore, and me just a freshman. She invited me to these fun things like photo scavenger hunt, trip to walmart, $1 trace bundy concert, and another concert in old town. She was so nice to me, it was unusual for me. I never got invited to anything in high school.
A couple weeks into school, Katie and Eddie (both lived at my dorm) after dinner one night invited me to go to their small group. At the time I was still thrilled to be invited to something and so I agreed to come. Once there I found myself in a position where I didn't know anything (I didn't even know the story of David, they were discusing Psalm 23) but even though I didn't know anything I felt comfortable, I felt like I had found away to make friends. Eddie gave me a bible and I continued to come to small group and the Rock (a college students focused service with contemporary worship music and a message).
I was new to all of it but everybody was so helpful, showing me where things were in the bible and explaining the background to the passages we discussed, actually they discussed. I didn't quite connect with the messages at the Rock. But there was something about these people that attracted me. They always had a smile on their face and they lived life as though they had purpose.(happiness and purpose that was what I was looking for)
Finally one night after the Rock (September 24, 2004 to be precise) I ended up walking back to campus from a park with Sarah and Eddie. It was a beautiful cool night and shortly after we started walking Eddie asked me what i thought about things, about small group/ rock. Earlier during the Rock I wrote a little note to God that I was willing to give this new life a try, I didn't understand but I did know that it might lead to happiness, purpose and friends. So in response to Eddie's questions I told him that I wanted to be Christian and I wanted to know what I had to do to join the "club". He tried explaining somethings and eventially told me I just had to pray. so on a park bench in Remington Gardens between 2 amazing people I accepted Christ.
I didn't realize how big of a deal it was until the next morning. Sarah had told everybody and so the whole day I was been congratulated and I even got notes from people. That is when it hit me that it wasn't just a "club". The next 2 weeks I read the bible and absorbed what others talked about. God also revealed to me sins I had done and my image of myself as a "good" girl was revealed to be a lie. By the time I was babtised on October 8th I had a better understanding of what this all meant.
I don't know really the exact time everything changed but I have changed.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" - 2 Corinthians 5:17
The past 11 months have been the best months of my life. There were many hard times and there still are but when you know the truths that Christ died for me, I'm going to live in heaven for eternity, he loves me, he has choosen me, he has a great purpose for my life, and many others that causes my heart to overflow with joy to thing about. I'm his daughter that he thinks is beautiful, I will always have his promises, Christ died for ALL my sins, I'm filled with the Spirit to guide me through life, I'm never alone, I'll always have a friend.
Well I grew up in a household that didn't go to church and we didn't even talk about such things. High school I was dedicated to running and school and nothing else. I had little friends and planned to make new ones in college. I planned to start a new life because the life I was currently living wasn't satisfying.
I went to CSU for their chemical engineering program and to run for them too, because I thought that was the only way I would continue to run, when in fact Colorado is one of the most active states. I flew out by myself and had my stuff shipped later. Some would say that it would be scary to be alone in a new place. For me I have always been okay with being alone.
Entering college I had dreams of making friends, doing well in school, maybe find a boyfriend, and find happiness and purpose in my life. Who would have guessed that God had a bigger/better plan for me.
I instantly clicked with my roomate and within the first week of college she invited me to a number of barbeques through different church organizations. I felt bad because I wasn't Christian and yet I was eatting their food. I considered church groups like clubs and so to me being christian was just a title for members of the church. I wasn't part of the "club", so am I allowed to eat their food?
Another important character that God put in my path was a girl who lived next door to me, Sarah. A sophmore, and me just a freshman. She invited me to these fun things like photo scavenger hunt, trip to walmart, $1 trace bundy concert, and another concert in old town. She was so nice to me, it was unusual for me. I never got invited to anything in high school.
A couple weeks into school, Katie and Eddie (both lived at my dorm) after dinner one night invited me to go to their small group. At the time I was still thrilled to be invited to something and so I agreed to come. Once there I found myself in a position where I didn't know anything (I didn't even know the story of David, they were discusing Psalm 23) but even though I didn't know anything I felt comfortable, I felt like I had found away to make friends. Eddie gave me a bible and I continued to come to small group and the Rock (a college students focused service with contemporary worship music and a message).
I was new to all of it but everybody was so helpful, showing me where things were in the bible and explaining the background to the passages we discussed, actually they discussed. I didn't quite connect with the messages at the Rock. But there was something about these people that attracted me. They always had a smile on their face and they lived life as though they had purpose.(happiness and purpose that was what I was looking for)
Finally one night after the Rock (September 24, 2004 to be precise) I ended up walking back to campus from a park with Sarah and Eddie. It was a beautiful cool night and shortly after we started walking Eddie asked me what i thought about things, about small group/ rock. Earlier during the Rock I wrote a little note to God that I was willing to give this new life a try, I didn't understand but I did know that it might lead to happiness, purpose and friends. So in response to Eddie's questions I told him that I wanted to be Christian and I wanted to know what I had to do to join the "club". He tried explaining somethings and eventially told me I just had to pray. so on a park bench in Remington Gardens between 2 amazing people I accepted Christ.
I didn't realize how big of a deal it was until the next morning. Sarah had told everybody and so the whole day I was been congratulated and I even got notes from people. That is when it hit me that it wasn't just a "club". The next 2 weeks I read the bible and absorbed what others talked about. God also revealed to me sins I had done and my image of myself as a "good" girl was revealed to be a lie. By the time I was babtised on October 8th I had a better understanding of what this all meant.
I don't know really the exact time everything changed but I have changed.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" - 2 Corinthians 5:17
The past 11 months have been the best months of my life. There were many hard times and there still are but when you know the truths that Christ died for me, I'm going to live in heaven for eternity, he loves me, he has choosen me, he has a great purpose for my life, and many others that causes my heart to overflow with joy to thing about. I'm his daughter that he thinks is beautiful, I will always have his promises, Christ died for ALL my sins, I'm filled with the Spirit to guide me through life, I'm never alone, I'll always have a friend.
AWAKE!!!
And do this, understanding the present time. The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. - Romans 13:11
Our time here on earth is short! Every moment here should not be wasted. WE need to recognize the opportunities before us. Opportunities to share the truth about God and Jesus to all. Matthew 28:19-20 Make disciples!
I confess I've been a sleep. Faith without action. I haven't been giving my all. What am I afraid of? God is at work and we don't know what he is going to do. I can't predict. Just look at what God did or is doing in your life to bring you to him. We all have stories, because God loves us all and that is why he will do whatever he can to bring us to him.
Pray that everyday we can regonize the opportunities he has put before us. Be brave!
Our time here on earth is short! Every moment here should not be wasted. WE need to recognize the opportunities before us. Opportunities to share the truth about God and Jesus to all. Matthew 28:19-20 Make disciples!
I confess I've been a sleep. Faith without action. I haven't been giving my all. What am I afraid of? God is at work and we don't know what he is going to do. I can't predict. Just look at what God did or is doing in your life to bring you to him. We all have stories, because God loves us all and that is why he will do whatever he can to bring us to him.
Pray that everyday we can regonize the opportunities he has put before us. Be brave!
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Humble Pie
When I read this on Katie's comment to me. I just started laughing just ask Janet. I don't know why its so funny!
But really, Have you ever started a eating challenge thinking that will be easy. But as you go along it gets harder and harder. This summer Chris and I tried the Capri-sun challenge (15 in 15 mins) easy right, that's what we thought. We were way to cocky! After 5 you started to feel it. We didn't even finish the 15. Giving up at 9 each, our stomachs couldn't take any more.
But anyway, what does that have to do with humility? Well when I first started to follow Christ, that is when I accepted Christ I was told that the Christian life wasn't easy but I didn't believe it. As I started the Christian life, God's challenges were relatively easy, and I took pride in the fact that I was growing so much with out much sweat. But as you dive deeper into God, has you eat more of the pie the harder it gets. Humility comes when you recognize that you can't do this on your own.
But really, Have you ever started a eating challenge thinking that will be easy. But as you go along it gets harder and harder. This summer Chris and I tried the Capri-sun challenge (15 in 15 mins) easy right, that's what we thought. We were way to cocky! After 5 you started to feel it. We didn't even finish the 15. Giving up at 9 each, our stomachs couldn't take any more.
But anyway, what does that have to do with humility? Well when I first started to follow Christ, that is when I accepted Christ I was told that the Christian life wasn't easy but I didn't believe it. As I started the Christian life, God's challenges were relatively easy, and I took pride in the fact that I was growing so much with out much sweat. But as you dive deeper into God, has you eat more of the pie the harder it gets. Humility comes when you recognize that you can't do this on your own.
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
God's Plan
I went to summitview for the first time in months. WE had a short message and then a little movie. The movie was about this guy named Craig who fell a 100 Ft! And lived! The story is amazing but what he pointed out was the question. "What does God have to do to get your attention?" For him it was falling. For me it was a simple bruise, that hurt a lot, the size of a giant baked potato( grown in Idaho of course!) and kept me off my feet for 3 weeks.
It happened playing soccer, I got kicked, Sunday night. We packed and left Iowa Tues, packed and left Colorado for Ireland Thurs. Friday night I was told to stay off of my leg until it healed. So I sat. Standing up to get around and to sing hymns. It hurt to walk and even to stand longer than 5 min. That meant that I would stay back at Charleville while everybody went out to share and go door to door. I stayed back and sort things, stuffed tracts, helped in the kitchen, folded napkins and did what every job they gave me. I came to Ireland to share the Gospel, experience mission life and to grow in Christ. These things were accomplished in God's way not mine.
In that time God taught me many things that I knew before but not completely and still not.
- Humility
- Be thankful for everything
- We should be living sacrifices, Romans 12
- Be content Philippians 4:12-13
- Always be joyful 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
- good will come of this Romans 8:28
- I get to suffer for Christ! 1 Peter 4:12-13
- He chooses the weak, and we are the weak 1 Corinthians 1:26-28
- We all have different jobs for God 1 Corinthians 3:7-9
- 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
- Work for the Lord Colossians 3:23
- Psalm 147:10-11
- There is nothing we can do without God
The biggest thing I realized just now is that God is constantly working in our lives (2 cor. 3:18) to sanctify us! We will never realize how much he has done until when he chooses to reveal. This time in Ireland was a time when he unveiled what he has been doing but only in a small dose. We are growing, we are being sanctified not just when we see it. Praise God.
It happened playing soccer, I got kicked, Sunday night. We packed and left Iowa Tues, packed and left Colorado for Ireland Thurs. Friday night I was told to stay off of my leg until it healed. So I sat. Standing up to get around and to sing hymns. It hurt to walk and even to stand longer than 5 min. That meant that I would stay back at Charleville while everybody went out to share and go door to door. I stayed back and sort things, stuffed tracts, helped in the kitchen, folded napkins and did what every job they gave me. I came to Ireland to share the Gospel, experience mission life and to grow in Christ. These things were accomplished in God's way not mine.
In that time God taught me many things that I knew before but not completely and still not.
- Humility
- Be thankful for everything
- We should be living sacrifices, Romans 12
- Be content Philippians 4:12-13
- Always be joyful 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
- good will come of this Romans 8:28
- I get to suffer for Christ! 1 Peter 4:12-13
- He chooses the weak, and we are the weak 1 Corinthians 1:26-28
- We all have different jobs for God 1 Corinthians 3:7-9
- 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
- Work for the Lord Colossians 3:23
- Psalm 147:10-11
- There is nothing we can do without God
The biggest thing I realized just now is that God is constantly working in our lives (2 cor. 3:18) to sanctify us! We will never realize how much he has done until when he chooses to reveal. This time in Ireland was a time when he unveiled what he has been doing but only in a small dose. We are growing, we are being sanctified not just when we see it. Praise God.
Monday, July 18, 2005
Friday, July 15, 2005
Today, everyday may it be God's
So at the daycare this song was played on a CD we were all listening to. It stuck with me through the day. Today is a perfect day that God made for me, every moment he ordained for me! I'm exactly where he wants me to be. I'm going to be thankful and recognize his blessings and his truth and his promise of renewing. He rewards those who trust in him, he rewards with the Spirit. Today was joyful because I saw him in it. Nothing is going to change my mind that today is God's and he loves me and will give me just the right amount of strength.
Artist: Hoku Lyrics
Song: Perfect Day Lyrics
Sun's up
A little after twelve
Make breakfast for myself
Leave the work for someone else
People say
They say that it's just a phase
They tell me to act my age,
Well I am
On this perfect day,
Nothing's standing in my way
On this perfect day,
When nothing can go wrong
It's the perfect day,
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon
I could stay, forever as I am
On this perfect day
Sun's down
A little after ten
I pick up all my friends
In my Mercedes-Benz
Wake up
Don't tell me it's just a dream
'Cause when I've had enough
You'll hear me say,
Now don't you try to rain on my
Perfect day,
Nothing's standing in my way
On this perfect day,
Nothing can go wrong
It's the perfect day,
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon
I could stay, forever as I am
On this perfect day
La la la
La la la,
Oh, oh
I'm in the race
But I've already won
(La la la)
And getting there can
Be half the fun
(La la la)
So don't stop me
Till I'm good and done,
Don't you try to rain on my
Perfect day
It's the perfect day
It's the perfect day
Nothing's gonna bring me down
I could stay, forever as I am
On this perfect day
Nothing's standing in my way,
On this perfect day,
Nothing can go wrong
I'm in the race
But I've already won
And getting there can
Be half the fun,
So don't stop me
Till I'm good and done,
Don't you try to rain on my
Perfect, day
On this perfect day
On this perfect day
* Reward at the bottom *
Look for the joy in the day, look for the best parts in people, thank them for sacrifices and acts of love, forgive them for wrongs and enjoy life alongside not far away. today will be a perfect day if i choose it to be.
Artist: Hoku Lyrics
Song: Perfect Day Lyrics
Sun's up
A little after twelve
Make breakfast for myself
Leave the work for someone else
People say
They say that it's just a phase
They tell me to act my age,
Well I am
On this perfect day,
Nothing's standing in my way
On this perfect day,
When nothing can go wrong
It's the perfect day,
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon
I could stay, forever as I am
On this perfect day
Sun's down
A little after ten
I pick up all my friends
In my Mercedes-Benz
Wake up
Don't tell me it's just a dream
'Cause when I've had enough
You'll hear me say,
Now don't you try to rain on my
Perfect day,
Nothing's standing in my way
On this perfect day,
Nothing can go wrong
It's the perfect day,
Tomorrow's gonna come too soon
I could stay, forever as I am
On this perfect day
La la la
La la la,
Oh, oh
I'm in the race
But I've already won
(La la la)
And getting there can
Be half the fun
(La la la)
So don't stop me
Till I'm good and done,
Don't you try to rain on my
Perfect day
It's the perfect day
It's the perfect day
Nothing's gonna bring me down
I could stay, forever as I am
On this perfect day
Nothing's standing in my way,
On this perfect day,
Nothing can go wrong
I'm in the race
But I've already won
And getting there can
Be half the fun,
So don't stop me
Till I'm good and done,
Don't you try to rain on my
Perfect, day
On this perfect day
On this perfect day
* Reward at the bottom *
Look for the joy in the day, look for the best parts in people, thank them for sacrifices and acts of love, forgive them for wrongs and enjoy life alongside not far away. today will be a perfect day if i choose it to be.
Saturday, July 02, 2005
Be a Light
So I have been feeling a little discouraged and the opposite of Joyful. Not where one wants to be. Especially Friday nights when we go to the Ped Mall to share. I felt no Spirit and so for an hour I didn't talk to anybody. Finally with only 20 min before it was time to meet up, I went sharing with Eddie. Had one conversation and then on our way to the Java House to meet up Eddie stopped this guy to "ask a couple questions"
This guy was no ordinary guy, possiblly drunk, but yet not quite. turns out this joyful guy is Christian and a funny guy. I don't know what it was about him but since him I've been so joyful. It was the Spirit that was shining out of him.
I pray that every time we go to talk to some body, the light, the Spirit just flows out of us.
This guy was no ordinary guy, possiblly drunk, but yet not quite. turns out this joyful guy is Christian and a funny guy. I don't know what it was about him but since him I've been so joyful. It was the Spirit that was shining out of him.
I pray that every time we go to talk to some body, the light, the Spirit just flows out of us.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Words do hurt
When you were growing up did you ever hear the phrase
"Sticks and Stones may break bones but names will never hurt"
I always believed this to be a lie. When I grew up I was teased like any other kid and often times the name calling did hurt but there were not sympathetic adults only the ones who would share this little ditty. It would just make me feel worse because now I'm being called weak, crying over nothing. Something you just can't ignore.
Today at the day care these 2 girls started calling each other names. Whenever I would try to stop it one would just say well she started it. When in fact if possible they both started it. They played "Last insult wins" at least in my eyes. Each insult got worse and worse. I'm glad I'm not their age because I don't think I could have taken it.
It just hurts to listen to, I pray these girls just love each other
"Sticks and Stones may break bones but names will never hurt"
I always believed this to be a lie. When I grew up I was teased like any other kid and often times the name calling did hurt but there were not sympathetic adults only the ones who would share this little ditty. It would just make me feel worse because now I'm being called weak, crying over nothing. Something you just can't ignore.
Today at the day care these 2 girls started calling each other names. Whenever I would try to stop it one would just say well she started it. When in fact if possible they both started it. They played "Last insult wins" at least in my eyes. Each insult got worse and worse. I'm glad I'm not their age because I don't think I could have taken it.
It just hurts to listen to, I pray these girls just love each other
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Patience!!!
Unfortunately today started off with me being a little impatient. I didn't want to be late to work, and so I got a little impatient(quietly at least!). In the car on the way to work I prayed for patience in the day. It's a fruit of the spirit so I'm promised it.
At work, a daycare, patience at times is a must. I didn't realize the patience God gave me today until I found myself breaking up a small fight and crouched down between 2 boys and calmly asking them what happened. That patience was from God because the whole afternoon was one upset kid after another. It seemed like every kid had something that was pushing my nerves. 4 girls fight about the silliest of things, Emily getting mad at me for not letting her play on the computer, DaRon running around the room and these 2 boys. When kids don't like each other, instead of avoiding each other like I do, they continue to annoy the other. Without God's patience I would have exploded.
When you find yourself lacking in one of the fruits of the Spirit, pray about because we are promised these things.
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness" ~ Galatians 5:22
At work, a daycare, patience at times is a must. I didn't realize the patience God gave me today until I found myself breaking up a small fight and crouched down between 2 boys and calmly asking them what happened. That patience was from God because the whole afternoon was one upset kid after another. It seemed like every kid had something that was pushing my nerves. 4 girls fight about the silliest of things, Emily getting mad at me for not letting her play on the computer, DaRon running around the room and these 2 boys. When kids don't like each other, instead of avoiding each other like I do, they continue to annoy the other. Without God's patience I would have exploded.
When you find yourself lacking in one of the fruits of the Spirit, pray about because we are promised these things.
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness" ~ Galatians 5:22
Here is to mornings with God
Since I last wrote on this here blog I have under gone some serious discipline mainly regarding my time. I now wake up at an hour that if written others might freak because that is when they go to bed. But this is clearly something God wants because it is far to easy to wake up and it's not like I go to bed that early. I go on a run every morning and then chill on the couch reading his word.
But what makes this time oh so precious to me is that I'm with God. and for me that is awesome because before this week I very very rarely found myself reading his word and running to him first when I struggled. Not a good idea. One will just feel lost even though you aren't. One feels alone when in fact you are surrounded by God's arms. One feels weak when in fact a powerful sword is stored in the bag on your back. One feels like their life is not going any where and God is not using them when in fact God has been planing an amazing life for you and has already used you in ways that if you knew shock and awe would drench your face with tears, your heart would give up totally to God and your mind would be cleared of every inpure thought. We would be made perfect because we would be in the presense of God and all his glory!. But that day has not come yet. But it will come, we are promised this.
This morning time is a chunk of time just for God, no one else is up. no friend of mine would be a wake whenever I do and always be ready to listen, encourage and comfort. We all want to be a friend like that who is always there to help but only God can. Starting the day with a big dose of God has made his presense more strong during the day too. He is like my secret shadow friend. When it is just the 2 of us it is a lot easier to his shadow but as the day moves along and other people and things flood my mind and my vision, his shadow fads among all the other shadows but if trained one can see that God can never be dimed.
But what makes this time oh so precious to me is that I'm with God. and for me that is awesome because before this week I very very rarely found myself reading his word and running to him first when I struggled. Not a good idea. One will just feel lost even though you aren't. One feels alone when in fact you are surrounded by God's arms. One feels weak when in fact a powerful sword is stored in the bag on your back. One feels like their life is not going any where and God is not using them when in fact God has been planing an amazing life for you and has already used you in ways that if you knew shock and awe would drench your face with tears, your heart would give up totally to God and your mind would be cleared of every inpure thought. We would be made perfect because we would be in the presense of God and all his glory!. But that day has not come yet. But it will come, we are promised this.
This morning time is a chunk of time just for God, no one else is up. no friend of mine would be a wake whenever I do and always be ready to listen, encourage and comfort. We all want to be a friend like that who is always there to help but only God can. Starting the day with a big dose of God has made his presense more strong during the day too. He is like my secret shadow friend. When it is just the 2 of us it is a lot easier to his shadow but as the day moves along and other people and things flood my mind and my vision, his shadow fads among all the other shadows but if trained one can see that God can never be dimed.
Sunday, June 12, 2005
What are you committed to?
While working at the Lodge today, it was a chance to listen to a teaching. Actually one of my favorite things. An hour goes by quicker that way.
"Learning to be a Follower" - Rick Whitney Faithwalkers 2004, I borrowed it from Nathan
Somethings that stuck
"it's not about the plays, its about the execution" He was telling a story about the coach at Notre Dame who gave his plays over to the other team but still won the game.
I instantly thought of my own desires to be a leader. I wanted to make plays but didn't even consider the execution part. I have to be able to execute, help out my current leaders before I can become a leader myself. It's not about making plays its also about making them happen. Encouraging the team, make them want to play.
So who are you committed to? God I hope above all else. But what about your commitment to your leaders and even your brothers and sisters. I thought this message was going to talk about following what your leaders tell you, but he touched on something I never thought about.
Commitment to each other. Have I declared my commitment to my brothers and sisters. Am I willing to change my plans to help another to get the job done? I confess no. When asked to do something I wouldn't because I would rather do something else.
God I pray for a change of heart, both mine and my fellow siblings. I pray that we can confess our commitments to each other and stand by them.
"Learning to be a Follower" - Rick Whitney Faithwalkers 2004, I borrowed it from Nathan
Somethings that stuck
"it's not about the plays, its about the execution" He was telling a story about the coach at Notre Dame who gave his plays over to the other team but still won the game.
I instantly thought of my own desires to be a leader. I wanted to make plays but didn't even consider the execution part. I have to be able to execute, help out my current leaders before I can become a leader myself. It's not about making plays its also about making them happen. Encouraging the team, make them want to play.
So who are you committed to? God I hope above all else. But what about your commitment to your leaders and even your brothers and sisters. I thought this message was going to talk about following what your leaders tell you, but he touched on something I never thought about.
Commitment to each other. Have I declared my commitment to my brothers and sisters. Am I willing to change my plans to help another to get the job done? I confess no. When asked to do something I wouldn't because I would rather do something else.
God I pray for a change of heart, both mine and my fellow siblings. I pray that we can confess our commitments to each other and stand by them.
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